![We can't wait to visit Apple, Oklahoma! Photo [CC-BY-2.0] via eoi.es.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/01/apple-logo-768x403.jpg){kind=logo}
I only hope that we never lose sight of one thing: that it was all started in a Los Altos garage. UNCLE WALT’S INSIDER H.Q., SVALBARD – Now that the news is official that Apple is buying Disney, we thought we’d assemble a panel of experts and deep thinkers to discuss the pros and cons…
We assume the deal includes the parks. City parks, that is. CUPERTINO, CA — In a recently leaked memo from CEO Tim “Bob” Cook, it appears that Apple, the first company to hit $3 Trillion in valuation, is poised to spend some of their stockpiled cash on acquiring Disney! Fans of Mickey Mouse dismayed by…
![Mickey likes to talks to tomatoes. No word if a squash can make him smile. Photo by Josh Hallett [CC BY-SA 2.0] via Flickr.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/disney-buys-veggietales--768x403.jpg)
Okay, now they own everything. BURBANK, CA — The Disney Company is in final talks with VeggieTales owner Universal to bring Bob the Tomato, Larry the Cucumber, and all of their vegetable friends under the Disney banner. Sources inside both companies say that they expect a deal to be closed soon. One of the final…
![Ultimate cosmic power!!!! Still can't reopen Disneyland. Image background by Carlos Donderis [CC BY-NC-ND 2.0] via Flickr.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/disney-uber-alles-merger-768x403.jpg)
And they are currently negotiating with both major political parties. BURBANK, CA — In a stunning development, the Disney Company announced today that it will be purchasing Apple, Google, Microsoft and Amazon, and all of their subsidiary brands. Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation) was ecstatic. “This is off the record, obviously,” she…
![What exactly are the mask's ear loops holding on to? Photo by Kjaergaard [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/shamu-wearing-proper-face-protection-768x432.jpg)
What exactly are Shamu’s mask’s ear loops holding on to? ORLANDO, FL — Looks like SeaWorld’s animals will get to swim around some more. Our taste buds’ loss is their gain. Interim SeaWorld CEO Marc Swanson (of Swanson TV dinners fame) presented their plans to the May 27th Orange County Economic Recovery Task Force (M27OCERTF,…