escanaba in da moonlight Archives - Uncle Walt's Insider
UWI step-planDisney

Step-planDisney: Disneyland Escanaba in Michigan, real or hoax?

Uncle Walt's Insider step-planDisney (Step)Moms answer your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear step-planDisney (Step)Moms: When will the Disney in Michigan open? I keep getting different dates. Or is this whole thing a hoax?" - Andrea DeBardelaben, Michigan Marty: Dear Barbie, thank you for writing. I hate to be the one to break this to you... but ... Read more
Epic Escanaba Universe in da moonlight. Concept art courtesy Universal.

Universal’s Epic Universe to relocate to Escanaba, Michigan

Soon, Escanaba will be just like Orlando! But slightly colder. ORLANDO, FL -- Following an announcement that construction on their new "Epic Universe" theme park had been halted, Universal Orlando hit us with another surprise. Rather than being the third park [Ed.: Universal claims it would be their fourth, but a warmed-over version of Wet 'n' Wild is not a theme park.] in the company's Florida portfolio, they'll be building the Epic Universe park just outside of Escanaba, Michigan. Escanaba? Seriously? Escanaba? Seriously. They ... Read more
UWI (Step)Moms Panel

(Step)Moms Panel: I want to visit Disneyland Escanaba. When will the border open?

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step)Moms: I live in Canada, and I'd really like to visit the new Disney park in Escanaba, Michigan. First, when do you think the border will open up? And what should I pack?" - Doug M., Thunder Bay ON Harriet: Just don't ... Read more
The actual headline from the Denver Post if this were real! Photo mostly from the Orlando Sentinel.

Disneyland Denver? Elitch’s “developer” might be Disney!

"The River Mile" project may have been a front for the Mouse! DENVER, CO -- Elitch Gardens (just "Elitch's" to the locals) was a beloved theme park in west Denver with roots going back to the late 1800's. Eventually, in 1995, the name (but not the "beloved") moved downtown, becoming a generic cookie-cutter amusement park monstrosity with great views of the mountains. (Then again, just about any place in Denver has great views of the mountains. It's not like they're hard to see. ... Read more
UWI Step Moms Panel

(Step)Moms Panel: “Is ‘Uncle Walt’ actually still touring Walt Disney World?”

The Uncle Walt's Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] "Dear (Step) Moms: Your article on Saturday was a report from your so-called 'Uncle Walt,' claiming he was still touring Walt Disney World. What kind of idiots do you think we are? The parks are shut down. He's not really still ... Read more