The Uncle Walt’s Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.]
“Dear (Step) Moms: My family of seven and I are going to Disney World next week! We’ve been planning the trip for over a year now and can’t wait. When should I buy our airfare?” – Randolf B., London, England
Marty:
About three months ago. Good luck!
Ub:
Hallo, Randolf, and thank you for writing to the (Step) Moms Panel.
December is a great time to go to Disney World. For one thing, you’ll never be lonely with your family and 100,000 of your closest fellow-theme-park-goers spread out across the park in a leisurely shoulder-to-shoulder fashion. In fact, even on the coldest days during the December Christmas Parade shoot, you’ll never get too cold, because the body heat keeps the area within six feet of the ground at a balmy 120 degrees while the Magic Kingdom is full.
For your trip next week, I suggest booking your airfare sometime next August. That way, you’ll know exactly how many people are scheduled to be on the flight when you book, and the airline is likely to give you a very good deal on the tickets – pennies on the dollar! In fact, if you’re especially shrewd, you can buy your tickets when you’re already at Disney World, on Irlo Bronson Memorial Highway, or Highway 192, or Hell as the locals like to call it. Just look for the signs talking about discounted tickets. You can’t miss them.
Harriet:
Just don’t go to Walt Disney World. There are already enough people there without you.
Walt:
Hi Reginald, thanks for asking. Air is free in the United States, so feel free to breath all you can!
X:
Hi Randolf. It’s good to hear from you. My advice is to only book airfare on days off the week that end in the letter ‘y’. That way, you’ll be sure to get the best rates. And even if they are cheaper, don’t book on Thomas Cook airlines. More hassle than it’s worth.
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