Practical advice for inserting yourself among other diseased Disney guests
DISNEY SPRINGS, FL — Disney Springs has reopened, without much coverage and fanfare. A few guests popped in to see if there were any sales, and to enjoy a churro. Many folks seem to be hesitant, though, waiting to see what happens after the reopening. (In other words, do the few who visit go home and immediate die a screaming death in agony?)
Well, Uncle Walt’s Insider is here to provide answers! We’ve been to Disney Springs, and we’re back with some lessons learned.
Contrary to what you read on Walt Disney News Today & Tomorrow (aka WDWNTT), Disney is using thermal scanning technology to take guests temperature. They are not using rectal thermometers. There is no need to drop your pants. [Ed.: That was pretty embarrassing.]
Formerly, the only guests allowed to wear masks were costumed characters, bank robbers, and really ugly people. Now, though, Cast Members and guests are required to wear masks. They want the kind that cover your nose and mouth — at the same time, apparently. [Ed.: Another lesson learned!]
Also a point to note, mud masks dry really fast in the Florida sun!
Hand washing stations are everywhere. Guests are strongly encouraged to stop at each one and wash their hands. Guests are strongly discouraged from washing things other than hands at these stations.
Goofy’s Whole Body Sanitizer Stations®
The alcohol-based Goofy’s Whole Body Sanitizer is really only for external use only. Do not use it because Jock went light on the vodka.
Also, even though the name suggests it, do NOT use this on certain parts of your body. It burns.
Dining at Disney Springs
After many unsuccessful attempts at eating, we were informed it is okay to remove your mask during the meal. (Unless, of course, you are unable to chew with your mouth closed. Then a mask is required. This is actually true at all Disney dining locations, including quick serve and snack carts, regardless of a global pandemic.)
Pants, shirts, and shoes are still required. Underwear is optional. Please don’t ask us how we know this.
Will you go to Disney Springs? Let us know in the comments below!
Cover photo: If you see any viruses there, report them to the nearest Cast Member. Photo by Thomas photography [CC BY-SA 4.0] via Wikimedia.