Joe Rohde's Earring implicated in more deaths | Uncle Walt's Insider

Joe Rohde’s Earring implicated in more deaths

Mug shot of Joe Rohde's Earring. Photo by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].

Rohde himself is not a suspect.

BURBANK, CA — Officials with the City of Burbank Police Department have confirmed that several recent deaths just outside the Imagineering headquarters in Glendale have now been officially attributed to Imagineer Joe Rohde’s Earring. Rohde himself is not accused of any wrongdoing, and the deaths are being classified as “accidental.”

The Most Famous Earring in the (Disney) World?

Most Disney fans are familiar with Imagineer Joe Rohde. Among many other things, he has worked on Spaceship Earth, The American Adventure, The Adventurer’s Club, and basically all of Disney’s Animal Kingdom. Rohde is (justifiably) famous for the long, dangling earring worn in his (now visibly stretched) left ear.

But is it Dangerous?

According to the Burbank Police, however, this earring should be classified as a deadly weapon. In a prepared statement, Detective Jun Burbank (no relation) said, “We’ve come across several fatalities lately that appear to have died as a result of accidental entanglement with Joe Rohde’s Earring. We repeat that the deaths are accidental, and there is no indication of foul play. Joe Rohde is not, repeat, NOT a suspect.”

Following a similar spate of accidental deaths in the Orlando Area, Rohde’s Earring is now responsible for 13 confirmed fatalities in the past five years. This death toll means that Rohde’s Earring is now the sixth most dangerous item in the US, behind lightning, sharks, guns, solar bears, and alcohol. The Earring is considered far more dangerous than lions, tigers, or bears. [Ed.: Oh my!]

Rohde’s Reaction

Joe Rohde was unavailable for comment, but was seen in the attic at the Haunted Mansion. We are unable to confirm if the earring was present.

Have you ever tripped over Joe Rohde’s Earring and lived to tell? Comment below!

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Cover photo, a mug shot of Joe Rohde’s Earring by alchetron.com [CC BY-SA 3.0].