Nothing says “overbearing dictator” like denying citizens their Churros. ANAHEIM, CA — While Disney continues to box up Disneyland for the move to Texas, even bigger news has dominated the headlines. California Governor Gavin Newsom (D[highlight bg=”#000000″ color=”#000000″]estroyer of Economies[/highlight]) is facing a recall from angry voters. Newsom’s previous orders, while strict, were at least…
![Construction is underway to add a drop and a loop to it's a small world. Photo by ARICAD [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia & pngitem.com.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/disneyland-small-world-adding-loop-768x403.jpg)
They say that fear can cement memories more clearly. Does that mean the song will stick in our heads more? ANAHEIM, CA — While every Disney fans wait to see when Disneyland will reopen (and whether it will reopen in California or Texas), there is some good news. The Disney Company, flush with cash because…
The Uncle Walt’s Insider (Step) Moms Panel answers your real questions with their own totally reliable advice. [Lawyer-mandated disclaimer: do NOT rely on this advice. Our panel of experts may or may not be actual stepmoms, but they are definitely evil.] “Dear (Step)Moms: I live in Splash Mountain and I’m tired of hearing these boats…
The Science® says the virus won’t survive the freezing process. Probably. Maybe. SACRADEMENTO, CA — Gov. Gavin Newsom (D-Hypocrite) issued new guidelines for theme park reopening in California today. Disneyland can reopen to any guests who have been frozen in carbonite for at least 14 days. Admission preference will be given to anyone frozen since…
This is Disney! There’s no [highlight bg=”#000000″ color=”#000000″]מִין[/highlight] at Disney! E.P.C.O.T. C.E.N.T.R.E. — Even though the Festival of THE Holiday [X: HEY!] is only a week into its annual run, Disney is already starting to talk about the next Festival coming to Epcot: the Festival of Fertility! Our own Uncle Walt stumbled across prep for this…