“I don’t even speak Netherlandian.” ROTTERDAM, THE NETHERLANDS — Disney’s new video streaming service, Disney+, won’t go live in the U.S. until next month, but some impatient fans aren’t waiting. You see, Disney+ is already active in the Netherlands. Consequently, over 10.3 million Disney fans have renounced their U.S. citizenship and applied for permanent residency…
No word yet on Sunflower the centaur or Dumbo‘s Jim Crow. BURBANK, CA — The Internet has been blowing up with stories about Disney+ being tested in the Netherlands. While most fans are excited to be able to stream real Disney classics like Condorman and The Boatniks, one loyal Uncle Walt’s Insider fan anonymously [Thanks,…
![The lion speaks tonight. Photo [CC0] via PxHere & [CC BY-NC 4.0] via PNGImg.com.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/next-lion-king-remake-using-real-animal-voices-768x432.jpg)
The next in a long series of Lion King remakes will be interesting. BR’ER BANK, CA — As previously reported, the Walt Disney Studios and Spa are going all-in on Lion King remakes. The second remake (working title: Cats) will be in theaters soon. And now the third remake has been announced for next year — and…
With great profit comes great desperation. UNDISCLOSED LOCATION, ANAHEIM, CA — As negotiations have broken down between Sony and Disney over the future of Spider-Man, one side has resorted to extreme measures. Rather than returning Spider-Man to Sony, Disney is apparently holding him as a bargaining chip. “It’s absolutely not kidnapping,” says Disney (the company)…
Social Justice Warriors claim a victory for Pisci-Americans everywhere. BR’ER BANK, CA — The Disney Studios has canceled production on its live-action remake of 1989’s The Little Mermaid. The move follows controversy over its casting. Apparently, activists decry the fact that no actual mermaids had been cast in mermaid roles. “Sure, back in the 80’s…