“Those dolls are packed close together indoors, singing.” DISNEYLAND, CA — Getting the Joe Biden animatronic to sign an executive order reopening Disneyland was just the first step. Now park officials are scrambling to make the Happiest Place on Earth the safest place on Earth. “We took a look at all of our attractions,” said…
![Construction is underway to add a drop and a loop to it's a small world. Photo by ARICAD [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia & pngitem.com.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/disneyland-small-world-adding-loop-768x403.jpg)
They say that fear can cement memories more clearly. Does that mean the song will stick in our heads more? ANAHEIM, CA — While every Disney fans wait to see when Disneyland will reopen (and whether it will reopen in California or Texas), there is some good news. The Disney Company, flush with cash because…
They just do everything right! PYONGYANG, NORTH KOREA — Amidst global shutdowns of the theme park and entertainment industries, one nation has managed to keep its Disney park operating. In fact, not just operating, but flourishing! In an article published yesterday, the Korean Central News Agency (KCNA) reported that “His Excellency Marshal Kim Jong Un…
For one family, Disney’s virtual boat ride becomes a nightmare. HOUSTON, TX — Jason and Michelle Hawkins, like so many other parents, had to cancel their family’s Disney vacation due to the COVID-19 outbreak. But their attempt to reclaim the magic for their kids using YouTube ride videos went awry. They discovered the dangers of…
![The Country Bear Band, now with earworms. Photo by Josh Hallett [CC BY 2.0] via Flickr.](https://unclewalts.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/country-bears-with-earworms-768x432.jpg)
A Country-singing bear? Who ever heard of that? BAY LAKE, FL — The Country Bear Jamboree has always had catchy tunes, but soon the popular attraction at Disney’s Magic Kingdom will receive a new audio system and a brand new soundtrack — and we’ve learned that the entire soundtrack will consist of (*drumroll*) earworms! Uncle…