Uncle Walt's Insider president Archives - Page 3 of 6

it's a small world of social distancing. Video still by Inside the Magic via YouTube.

Dolls in “it’s a small world” being masked, spaced 6 feet apart

"Those dolls are packed close together indoors, singing." DISNEYLAND, CA -- Getting the Joe Biden animatronic to sign an executive order reopening Disneyland was just the first step. Now park officials are scrambling to make the Happiest Place on Earth the safest place on Earth. "We took a look at all of our attractions," said Disney (the company) spokesperson Jun Disney (no relation), "and put together a prioritized checklist of changes that were needed. And number one on the list was it's a ...

Cover photo: Our first robot president signs another diktat. Photo by WillMcC [CC BY-SA 3.0] via Wikimedia / ABC News.

Disney’s Biden animatronic signs Executive Order reopening Disneyland!

Even malfunctioning, it's still more coherent than the real thing. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- Disney Parks, Resorts & Spas officials have "taken advantage of a unique time in history," Uncle Walt's Insider has learned. "We know that there have been a flurry of executive orders being signed by Biden," said our source, who wishes to remain anonymous. Disney (no relation) continued, "And we have a Biden animatronic in the Hall of Presidents, and a resort in California that's been shut down for ...

February 10, 2021 by Marty in California, Florida

President* Biden's animatronic in the Hall of President*s is already malfunctioning. Or is it? Photo by Kjersti Holmang [CC BY-SA 4.0] via Wikipedia.

Report: Biden animatronic figure already malfunctioning

It's only recently been installed, but it seems to have the same glitches as on the campaign trail. WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- The Magic Kingdom Park's Hall of Presidents attraction is reportedly closed after the animatronic figure of President* Joe Biden began malfunctioning, less than ten days after it was installed. Reports from insiders say that the figure would randomly say things not in the script, like "salute the Marines" and "I don't know what I'm signing." And recently, the figure announced it ...

January 29, 2021 by Marty in Florida

Joe Biden animatronic already installed in Hall of Presidents; “We made it months ago”

Oddly, it arrived back from the DNC in a box labeled "John Gill." WALT DISNEY WORLD, FL -- The Hall of Presidents at Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom already has a new occupant. President* Joe Biden's animatronic was installed within minutes of his swearing-in. Normally the process of creating and installing a new presidential animatronic takes months after a change in administration. But this time, Disney was prepared. "Not a lot of wear" "We've actually had the audio-animatronic built for months," says Disney (the company) ...

January 20, 2021 by Marty in Florida

Now that he can't tweet, think of what he'll do with all this new time on his hands! Image © Disney.

Twitter permanently bans @RealDonaldDuck

First they came for the ducks, but I did not speak out because I was not a duck... SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- Complete Unbiased® social media giant Twitter is permanently banning the @RealDonaldDuck account from ever tweeting again. Head Twit Jack Dorsey announced the move today. "We try to understand The Donald's tweets, but they are just uncomprehensible most of the time. So given his anger issues and his blatant Nazi past, we figured he must be inciting violence." Uncle Walt's Insider will keep ...

January 13, 2021 by Marty in Other