Dear Stupid Guests . . .

[SWTexasBelle]

I'm at the World, celebrating my b-day. My 18 year old daughter had a rough day, and composed a letter to SGs for her blog which I thought I would share.

Dear Disney World guests,

I understand with this many people in one place, shit will happen. It is difficult for everyone to get around, some of us more than others, and I get that it won't be easy for any of us. I have navigated Disney with a stroller, with a wheelchair, with a large group, with a small group, and by myself, so chances are if you're in a difficult position, I honestly know how you feel.

I realise it is easier for me to get around when I'm by myself than it is for most people. I'm 5'1 and fairly slim, so I'm not taking up a lot of room, and I've been navigating this park for the last 13 years, so I could most likely do it with my eyes closed. However, I do, in fact, still exist, and therefore you may not do any of the following:

- Attempt to plow through me as if I was not there. I am not a Haunted Mansion escapee. I will not desolidify if you attempt to walk through me.

- Deliberately cut me off. I know there are many people trying to get to the same place, but when you go out of your way to block me, I have every right to twist off your head. Jumping in front of me will perhaps save you about 5 seconds. I'm not sure that's a time difference you should be willing to lose your head over. Also, I am sure there is a special place in hell for the people who cut children off from their families. Today someone cut off Liam and it took me a few minutes to find him. When I did, he was crying and wandering around in the middle of the street. I swear if I knew who'd done it, I would be in jail for homicide.

- Shove me. Today a group of cheerleaders started pushing me forward in the Haunted Mansion while there was no room in front of me, causing me to nearly topple over Jackson. Hope they enjoyed their seven second-headstart (oh, I counted). Yesterday I was shoved into a railing at Buzz. Last night at Downtown Disney I was shoved into a tree. I'm sorry, am I in your way? 5'1, 115-pound me standing over to the side of the walkway, in your way? Which brings me to:

- Stop walking in the center of the walkway. If you need to stop, please pull over. It's like driving; you wouldn't throw on the brakes in the middle of the highway, so don't throw on the brakes in the middle of the walkway. See, that's why they call it a walkway. If you must stop and read your map, may I suggest you sit on that bench conveniently located three steps to your right? Even better are the ones who stop their strollers while walking not one full step ahead of you, or the groups of twelve who stand in single file across the entire walkway. I hope you people are enjoying this foolishness because I am exactly two seconds from bashing your brain in with this jolly Year of a Million Dreams mug.

- Mosey while blocking the walkway. I'm glad you have nowhere to be, but I have a Fastpass I'm ten minutes late for, so if you would please at least move your group to the side of the walkway so other people can get by, I would gladly spare your skull the aforementioned jolly mug.

Also, if you are any of the following, there is no way you will ever do anything right and you should leave my presence immediately: high school cheerleader, high school marching band member, high school dance squad member, high schooler, tour group (particularly Brazilian tour groups; I understand Brazil is a lovely country, but as it appears the line for Pirates is very long and I will most likely be behind you for the entirety of it, please sing a song with more words than "Brazil, Brazil, Brazil"), person who asks questions pertaining to the time of the 3:00 parade, little girl who thinks it's okay to cut ahead of me in line and motion for the rest of your party to join you (Hope you enjoyed that elbow in your stomach, by the way. You're welcome. Love, the universe.), "goth" kid complaining about everything from the heat (so don't wear long black sleeves in 90+ degree weather, Mensa candidate) to the teacups (if they're "lame", you're not doing it right).

Have a magical effing day.

Love,
Ria

P.S. My shoes are way cuter than yours.

[StephM]

OK, your daughter is frickin hilarious. :D:

We will be arriving tomorrow. I am also pretty small, which I think makes me invisible.

Happy Birthday!!!! Hope you are having a great time even with all those SG's around.

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

You should transmit that to guest relations, so they can print it out and give it to SG's as necessary!

hehehehe

[hobie16]

Hahahahahahaha!!! Very good!

[ectomstr]

haha! so awesome! ^^

[Sarah Magdalene]

<<little girl who thinks it's okay to cut ahead of me in line and motion for the rest of your party to join you (Hope you enjoyed that elbow in your stomach, by the way. You're welcome. Love, the universe.)>>

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

So true as I have seen it before. These two little kids, like 5 and 8 were pushing around side of people though the line at Test Track. If someone didn't move, they just stood there and stared up at you dumbfounded. Not even speaking.

Just cause you are small children does not mean we will obey your whim.

[svickersart]

Shes at a dissadvantage, I dont experience most of those problems. Being 6 feet tall and roughly 300 pounds, only the realy stupid people try to shove you out of the way. We were at DL, leaving for the night, good crowd, walking accross mainstreet at the hub end just before it starts, they were pretty much hearding people that way, an asian womman about 5 feet tall and 90 pounds decieds shes going to shove her way through the crowd, it took me a minute to figure out what was going on, she came up the side of me and ran into my GF's son whos about 5'6" and 165 and she was bouncing off him trying to get by. Watching someone that small try to shove past someone twice their size is pretty funny, after half a dozen trys he turned around to see what was going on, I had figured it out and stepped next to himblocking her way completely, she didnt try to shove me, guess she figured a kids ok though.

I have never had a little kids try to sneak past me in line but have had adults do it, I let one get by then I make sure no others can get by so the group is split, they are quite pleasant when they ask you to move so they can step back and rejoin their group.

Steve

[EeyoresButterfly]

Svick: You are lucky! I'm 4'10", so people tend to not even see me. It's really fun wandering the theme parks with my bf. He is 6'4", and I have a very hard time hearing him with all of the background noise! It's nice walking the park with him though, because people don't try to shove past us!

[joanna71985]

I wish I had a tall boyfriend. I may not be as short as you, but I am still short enough where people standing in front of my block my view. Luckily I have taught myself to be able to squeeze around/through people, which helps in After Spectro/Before Wishes crowds.

[Sarah Magdalene]

Yes, the squeezing though tight places is a good trick once mastered! I also take advantage of being quick footed as well. I love talking to fellow mouse Friends about such things. Typically, no one else gets our POV on the world. I swear, only at WDW do we have our nice own little niche where we all can commune happily!