Jungle Cruise!!!

[Master_Gracey]

So I'm sure many of you know the #1 rule at the Jungle Cruise. DO NOT CROSS THE CRATES. Yes, do NOT cross the center creates. Being a loader/unloader at the Jungle Cruise is quite an experience to say the least. We have a system in which we seat guests, we are not just randomly placing guests on these seats. What we love is when we say "okay, group of 5, stay to the right. the right. the right sir... sir... the right.. SIR THE RIGHT." OR... "Hi there! how many in your party today?" "umm.. lets see... 1...2...3... yeah 3 people!" so I let 3 people by and ask the next group how many and they say "im with them.." LEARN TO COUNT. alkjsdlfkajsdfasdf'lkasjdoi Even better, is when we guests from Brazil hold up 6 fingers and say "four." and find out theres actually 7 in the group... Welcome to the Jungle Cruise.

Here's another question.... Guests would never answer a phone on Splash Mountain, or respond to a text on Dumbo... but WHY ON EARTH do guests continue a conversation on a phone while they are on the Jungle Cruise? Being a skipper myself, I find not only rude, but ANNOYING. No one else can enjoy the cruise because I am fighting with this person on the phone while the person on the phone is fighting with the PA system on the boat. And then they get mad when I crack a joke about them? gahh!!

Want another one? Sure!! So I had a group of French Canadians on my boat one time. Didnt speak a lick of English. They were being loud and obnoxious the ENTIRE time. Very rude.. very annoying.. very unsatisfying experience for the guests who were trying to enjoy it. At the very end of the cruise I asked them. "Are you from France or Canada?" They heard the name Canada and started going YESSS!! YEAH!! WOOO!! and then this girl chimed in "YEA CANADA BEAT USA!! USA LOSERS!!!!!!" .............you just ruined my boat... and now you insult us, IN AMERICA?! you better run when you get off this boat ma'am... needless to say, the rest of the boat was about to kill this group. And rightfully so..

Jungle Cruise is full of hilarious stories such as these. Monorail_Red can attest to that. In one visit he noticed a good one. More to come!

-Skipper Master_Gracey (? haha)

[Lasolimu]

So I had a group of French Canadians on my boat one time. Didnt speak a lick of English.

I must say that this group probably spoke English quite well, I always hear stories of French Canadians demanding French be spoken in perfect English because they will only speak French.

[Doctor McKey]

Just wait till you have someone decide to breastfeed or change their kids crappie diaper on a trip.... i have had this happen multiple times when i went on safari...

The Doctor

[disneyprincess1988]

Oh believe me, I feel your pain when it comes to loading and obnoxious guests on rides. One of my biggest pet peeves when I'm loading at GMR is asking guests "How many?" and they'll tell me "4 1/2", the half being a young child or baby. Um, so your kid isn't really human or something? Please tell me the TOTAL number in your party. Makes it a lot easier for me to tell the person in preshow how many more people I need to load the vehicle.

Or another story: The doors on the GMR vehicles don't always like to open by themselves. So there are small kick plates that we just kick with our toes that will open the stuck doors. Instead of waiting for me to use the kick plate to open their door, this group decided it would be more convenient to climb over the seats into the row behind them to get out. *facepalm*

[Monorail_Red]

Oh believe me, I feel your pain when it comes to loading and obnoxious guests on rides.

When working express load...have the same issues.

"Please keep moving all the way down the platform filling in ALL available space...please do not stop"

I'm only talking to everyone.

[delsdad]

Just wait till you have someone decide to breastfeed or change their kids crappie diaper on a trip.... i have had this happen multiple times when i went on safari...

The Doctor

A diaper change on a moving safari truck ?! That could turn out VERY badly !

[delsdad]

I must say that this group probably spoke English quite well, I always hear stories of French Canadians demanding French be spoken in perfect English because they will only speak French.

Unfortunately, this is all too common. In a town of 9000 souls, the single family who wishes to speaks French can force all government services to be delivered in French. In spite of the fact that the overwhelming second language of the citizens is Ukrainian, or Ojibway, or Tagalog, or even German...
I saw it happen. Naturally the father was the French teacher in town.

Some people are more equal than others !

[Doctor McKey]

"How many?" and they'll tell me "4 1/2", the half being a young child or baby.

In their defense... i use that joke all the time.. but only when they forget to count their kid in the first place...

I am considering learning Klingon or even something as outlandish as ( insert made up language from the Star Trek universe ) just to go around and get reactions.....

The Doctor

[disneyprincess1988]

In their defense... i use that joke all the time.. but only when they forget to count their kid in the first place...

Well, I can forgive you because you use it only for that reason.

[KidAtHeart]

While I'm the first to say that some french Canadian's can make the rest of us Canadian's cringe, they are, thankfully, a small minority. Most french Canadian's are great people. Unfortunately, when the jerks leave our country, they think it means that they have permission to be twice as bad as they are at home (and trust me, they can be awful at home, too).