Stupid Guest Tricks

What are some of your spiels? They can be creative, stupid, or just funny!! Post them here!!

Mine are:

"Honey I Shrunk The Audience":

(After Dr. Channing says, "Cherrio")
"Yes, Cherrios to you too, Dr. Channing, as well as Cocoa Puffs, Corn Puffs, Cornflakes, Corn Chex,
Wheat Chex, Rice Chex, and Life. So, who love LIFE?? What no one loves Life? Oh, well...."

"I would like to take a quick survey here today, by show of hands who is visting from out of the country??
WELCOME to America!!

Out of State? Like our governor says, (Arnold Schwarzenegger's voice) "Welcome to Cali- for - nia!!

Out of town? Welcome to good ol' Anaheim!!

Already out of money?? Welcome to Disneyland, FOLKS!!"

"I like to introduce this little part coming up and I call this my dramatic pause:

(Dramatic Pause)

(Pose)"

"How is everyone doing today/ tonight? Nah, nah, nah, you can do it better then that!! HOW ARE YA
ALL DOING TODAY/ TONIGHT?!?!?!?! THAT'S the SPIRIT at the Happiest/Merriest Place On Earth that you
call Disneyland, but what I personally like to call.....................is WORK!!!"

"Thank you for joing us here at the Imagination Institute, if you enjoyed today's/ tonight's presentation,
my name is Dr. Dan, if you didn't my name is Dr Phil......I'm just kidding!! Really, my name is Dr.
Nick. You have just finished watching 'It's Tough To Be A Bug'.............. I'm just kidding. Thank
you for visiting us at Knott's Berry Farm.............................again, I am just KIDDING!!"

"Please gather up your personal belongings: bags, backpacks, purses, cameras................and your
children because any children left behind will be taken back here, reshrunk and be permanently displayed
with their feet glued to the floor at 'It's A Small World (Holiday)' where they have to sing that hideous
song, 'It's A Small World After All'...........over, and................over, and..........over again!!!"

Astro Orbitor:

"Attention all pilots: Please stand by for incoming transmission from Mission Control....."

Attention all pilots: Captain Dan here from Mission Control. We have a special Birthday here today.
(Name) turns (Age) years old today. So, on a count of three, I want everybody to wish (Him/Her/Them)
a Happy Birthday screaming at the top of your lungs.....1.....2......3:

*HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!*

And On this special day, I have a special song for them and it goes something like this:

'This is the Birthday Song,

it's not very long, HEY!!!'"

speils huh...

Normal Mansion ER:
Ladies and gentleman boys and gouls, for the best view of the portraits above kindly drag your bodies away from the walls and lay them to rest in the dead center of our gallery.

Or...If I have smart ass kids saying dead center I use
and lay them to rest on the dark side of the carpet.

Holiday Mansion ER:
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and gouls
To continue this journey there aren't many rules
To see how Jack has decked our haunted halls
Please kindly drag your bodies away from the walls

At Pooh:
(Load)Bounce on in folks watch your step. Once you are seated pull down on your honey bar making sure it is sticky stuck. Have a tiggerific time. TTFN, ta ta for now.

Watch out for the 500 foot drop, the tripple loop, the ring of fire oh and you may get wet.

No eating, drinking or disco dancing.

Today's weather blustery with a chance of showers.

(Unload) Welcome back honey bees, bounce out to your right and watch your step as you make a bee line for the exit. Have a honey of an evening.

Mansion Holiday Spiel

From house to house with a true sense of joy
Jack happily issued presents and toys
from roof top to roof top he jumped and he skipped
leaving presents that seemed to be straight from the crypt
Unaware that the world was in panic and fear
jack merrily spread his own brand of cheer
for you see, jack created christmas with quite some error
for instead of creating merriment, he created absolute terror

This spiel is copyrighted, permission must be given by me before it's use

If you spiel that when I'm at Foyer I'm going to be pissed. Just close the damn doors already! :P If you want to spiel something that long, close the doors and shut off power before it decends so the Foyer cast member can start loading the Foyer for the next ER load. Thank you. :D

Stduck wrote: At Pooh:
(Load)Bounce on in folks watch your step. Once you are seated pull down on your honey bar making sure it is sticky stuck. Have a tiggerific time. TTFN, ta ta for now.

Watch out for the 500 foot drop, the tripple loop, the ring of fire oh and you may get wet.

No eating, drinking or disco dancing.

Today's weather blustery with a chance of showers.

(Unload) Welcome back honey bees, bounce out to your right and watch your step as you make a bee line for the exit. Have a honey of an evening.

Oh man, I think you loaded me once. About 2 junes ago my class went for a field trip and one of my smart ass friends bounced into the car after you said that. It was hilarious.

Couldn't have been me. I just got trained on Pooh in July of 2004. No possible way.

WDW Railroad departing Frontierland:

"Sit them young 'uns in the middle of the seat where the bears can't reach 'em. And the rest of you, keep your arms and legs inside the train and off the menu!"

Yeah Chris your to new at mansion to tell me what to do. Besides if you knew how I did that spiel, the doors need to be closed and it can now only be done in ER1, can't do it in ER2. So yeah i think that now I will do it everytime your at Foyer with the doors open and do it just to piss you off.

Don't cry because your boyfriend got fired.

DLRFantasmic!Dan wrote: And On this special day, I have a special song for them and it goes something like this:

"This is the Birthday Song,

it's not very long, HEY!!!"

Back when I worked the submarines ('91), I would variously introduce the captain as Capt Tran, Capt Crunch, Capt O' Industry, Capt Martinez (any Greaseman fans among ya?) and so on.

As a Store Ops guy, I would always say, "May I help the next Happy Disney Guest?" which always got a smile.