How Can You Not Know That Guns Are Not Allowed In The Parks?!?!?!

[hobie16]

Stay On-Topic? :hysteria:

Did you hear about the testicle biting fish in the Danish-Swedish strait of Oresund? :fishlies:

[Goofyernmost]

Stay On-Topic? :hysteria:
Really, the Off-Topic thing we have here is what I love! Where else can you talk about Guns and Colonscopies in the same thread? :D:

No Disrespect to PatchoBlack.

All we can hope is that the Doctor knows the difference between a gun and colonscope.

[DisneyMom]

Did you hear about the testicle biting fish in the Danish-Swedish strait of Oresund? :fishlies:

Have they been discovered during Colonoscopies?

[Goofyernmost]

Have they been discovered during Colonoscopies?

No, it was while cleaning their gun.

[BRWombat]

Remember, kids, firearms and rectal exams don't mix.

[hobie16]

Rip off the NFL, go to jail.

Press release from The United States Attorney's Office, Northern District of Ohio

Toledo Man Faces Charges For Having 18 Firearms, Body Armor And 40,000 Rounds Of Ammunition Despite Manslaughter Conviction

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
January 16, 2013

A criminal indictment was unsealed today charging Toledo resident Richard Schmidt with a variety of crimes related to his possession of 18 firearms, body armor and more than 40,000 rounds of ammunition despite a previous conviction for the crime of manslaughter, said Steven M. Dettelbach, United States Attorney for the Northern District of Ohio, and Stephen D. Anthony, Special Agent in Charge of the Federal Bureau of Investigation’s Cleveland office.

Schmidt, 47, was arrested in December following searches of his home and business. He was convicted of manslaughter in 1990 in the Lucas County Court of Common Pleas. Schmidt was forbidden from possessing firearms, ammunition or body armor as a result of his conviction.

“It is deeply troubling that law enforcement found this man, with a prior homicide conviction, in possession of an arsenal,” Dettelbach said. “We owe the FBI and our other law enforcement partners our thanks that they caught this man, with 18 firearms -- some of them assault weapons – high-capacity magazines, more than 40,000 rounds of ammunition, and a bulletproof vest stored in a locked room in a mall, before anyone was hurt.”

Anthony said: “Richard Schmidt is not only accused trafficking in counterfeit goods but also is accused of being a felon in possession of a significant quantity of firearms and ammunition. We are pleased that the FBI, U.S. Attorney's Office, and our partners were able to take Richard Schmidt off the street.”

Count 1 charges that Schmidt, on Dec. 21, 2012, possessed approximately 300 rounds of ammunition and four firearms: two Ruger P95 9 mm pistols, a Sig Sauer P250 9 mm pistol and a Taurus PT145 pistol.

Count 2 charges that Schmidt, on Dec. 28, 2012, possessed approximately 40,188 rounds of ammunition and 18 firearms: a Stag Arms AR-15 rifle, an Armalite AR-10 rifle, a Mossberg 500 12-gauge shotgun, a Remington 870 Express 12-gauge shotgun, a Winchester M94 30/30 rifle, a Winchester M190 .22-caliber rifle, a Remington M700 rifle, a Mossberg M535 12-gauge shotgun, a Russian American Armory SAIGA 12-gauge shotgun, a Federal Arms Corporation FA 91 .308-caliber rifle, an Eagle Arms 5.56-caliber rifle, a Rock River Arms AR-15 rifle, a Ruger Mark II pistol and a Sturm-Ruger .375 magnum pistol.

Count 3 charges that Schmidt, on Dec. 28, 2012, possessed body armor.

Count 4 charges that between Sept. 30, 2011 and Dec. 21, 2012, Schmidt trafficked in counterfeit goods, specifically goods with counterfeit logos and brand-name markings of the National Football League, Nike, Reebok and Louis Vuitton.

These items were found following searches of Schmidt’s home on Marlow Road in Toledo, the store he operates, Spindletop Sports Zone, in Bowling Green, Ohio and trailers in the parking lot of the shopping center that includes Spindeltop Sports Zone. Investigators also recovered seven high-capacity magazines during the search, according to court records.

The United States Attorney’s Office for the Northern District of Ohio filed 176 indictments for violations of federal firearms laws, with the average sentence being more than six years in prison.

This case is being prosecuted by Assistant U.S. Attorneys Duncan T. Brown and Linda H. Barr following an investigation by the FBI, with assistance from Immigration and Customs Enforcement – Homeland Security Investigations, the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives, U.S. Border Patrol, the Ohio State Highway Patrol, the Toledo Police Department, the Bowling Green Police Department and the Wood County Sheriff’s Office.

If convicted, the defendant’s sentence will be determined by the court after review of factors unique to this case, including the defendant’s prior criminal records, the defendant’s role in the offenses and the characteristics of the violations. In all cases, the sentences will not exceed the statutory maximum and in most cases they will be less than the maximum.

An indictment is only a charge and is not evidence of guilt. A defendant is entitled to a fair trial in which it will be the government’s burden to prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt.

[felinefan]

And obviously nobody who sold him the ammo and arms thought to do a background check. I hope he never sees the light of day. His I.Q. must be in the single digits.

[hobie16]

CHARLESTON, WV, 8/27/13: The victim in an early morning shooting has been identified as 24-year-old Ladaraean Duran Mixon of Detroit. He originally gave police an alias of Omarion Cooper. Police said he had several aliases. Mixon also had heroin on him at the time of the shooting. "Physical evidence tells us [Mixon] accidentally shot his own testicle," said Lt. Steve Cooper, chief of detectives for the Charleston Police Department. "It's not uncommon for criminals to shoot themselves in the groin area."

BROOKLYN, NY, 8/24/13: The heartless creep accused of shooting a 3-year-old Brooklyn boy in the head asked the tot’s babysitter to hold off on calling 911 to give him time to stash the gun, prosecutors charged Sunday.

NEW HAVEN, CT, 8/24/13: An 81-year-old man accidentally shot himself while trying to combat a raccoon, police said. James Pace Sr. told officers he had been having a problem with a large raccoon scratching at his back door. Pace told police he armed himself with a .22 caliber rifle and waited for the raccoon to show, but while waiting, he sneezed and fell out of his chair, shooting himself in the shin.

LODI, CA, 8/24/13: Lodi police said a young boy caused a SWAT team member’s firearm to discharge during a reading event hosted for children last Saturday. The SWAT member suffered a minor flesh wound. During the Little Buckaroos Reading Round-up event, Officer Robert Rench was helping a boy try on pieces of SWAT team gear, when another young boy approached unnoticed. The boy, who witnesses told police was about 6 years old, reached his finger toward the gun and pulled the trigger. The Glock handguns that SWAT members carry aren’t equipped with a safety.

CHINO, CA, 8/25/13: An apparent booze-fueled dispute over loud music between two groups at a Chino campground over the weekend escalated to the point where men from both sides drew guns and opened fire. No one was hurt, but the two alleged gunmen have plenty to explain. It turns out that the rival gun-toting campers were both Los Angeles County sheriff's deputies.

YORK, SC, 8/26/13: A school resource officer's weapon was accidentally fired into a sidewalk outside York Comprehensive High School this morning.
UPDATE: He's back on the job.

CHEATHAM CO., TN, 8/26/13: A man was hospitalized after his neighbor and best friend shot him in the eye, and, by all accounts, it was just a terrible accident. The man responsible for the accident is so remorseful he is now getting rid of all of his guns, and deputies hope other gun owners learn from his mistake.

TOBYHANNA TOWNSHIP, PA, 8/26/13: Two men who attempted to rob a Tobyhanna Township home are in custody after one of them was accidentally shot in the head by an accomplice.

NORTH FORT MYERS, FL, 8/27/13: A 16-year-old North Fort Myers boy suffered a gunshot wound to the hand yesterday, after allegedly playing with a pistol he had stolen from his grandmother.

SPOKANE VALLEY, WA, 8/29/13: A 22-year-old man is in critical condition after accidentally shooting himself in the head overnight in Spokane Valley. The Sheriff’s Office said alcohol played a “major factor” in the incident.

[felinefan]

Depends on what you call security.

[hobie16]

For everything you see, I'm sure there is more that you don't.

Only Ernie knows for sure.