Stupid Guest Tricks

Me: “Sir, would you like to use any coupons today?”

Customer: “Yes, I’ve been saving them. Here you go!”

(He hands me a coupon that had expired five years previously.)

Me: “Sir, your coupon is expired.”

Customer: “WHAT?! What do you mean its expired? You f***ing b****, you’re just trying to steal my f***ing money! You’re trying to rob me! You and this f***ing company are trying to steal my f***ing money!”

(The customer attempts to climb over the counter and attack me. Thankfully, my manager intercepts him.)

Manager: “Sir, I need you to come with me.”

(My manager hauls the customer off counter by the back of his collar and drags him outside. Ten minutes pass, and he comes back in hauling a very disheveled customer by the shirt.)

Customer: “Your manager told me that I need to apologize to you. I’m sorry for yelling.”

Manager: “Now, apologize for cursing at her.”

Customer: “I’m sorry for cursing at you.”

Manager: “Now, what’s our policy on expired coupons?”

Customer: “You don’t accept them.”

Manager, to me: “Is he forgiven, or would you like to have him arrested?”

Me: “No, its okay. ”

Manager, to customer: “Now get out, and don’t come back.” *throws customer out*

Nice! Wow... I seriously almost feel like crying. I hope I can be that good a manager some day!

..now a GREAT manager would have allowed the person behind the counter to zap the SG in the balls with a taser.

hobie16 wrote: Manager: “Now, apologize for cursing at her.”

Something you need to tell us?

CujoSR wrote:Something you need to tell us?

I hope not. It was a story I found on Not Always Right.

Managing is all about knowledge of policies, procedures, and the law... and then using that to put the fear of God into those troublesome few.

CA Screamin Dude wrote:Managing is all about knowledge of policies, procedures, and the law... and then using that to put the fear of God into those troublesome few.

LAD Security? ;) You have learned very well.

hobie16 wrote:I hope not. It was a story I found on Not Always Right.

Best site ever. :D

Mr. M wrote:Best site ever. :D

Sory Mr. M,,,,,,,,,,second best site ever. ;)

And this is an owner.

(One night while working a busy dinner shift, a elderly couple shows up in my section, at a table that just left. I had assumed that the hostesses were just busy and sat them immediately.)

Me: “Welcome to *****, what can I get you to drink?”

Them: “We’ve been sitting here for 10 minutes? What took you so long?”

(I knew that I had cleared the table not more than 5 minutes ago.)

Me: I’m terribly sorry, we’re awful busy. Now, what can I get you tonight?”

(They order coffee and water, with extra cream. I get their coffee as fast as possible, but have to make a second trip for the creamer. Before I can let them know I’ll be right back…)

Them: “That took forever! What’s wrong with you? It’s never taken this long before. Where’s our creamer?!”

(I calm them down enough to get away from the table and get the creamer. I am gone less than 30 seconds.)

Them: “This is the worst service I’ve ever had! I can’t believe they would hire you! This isn’t enough creamer!”

Me: “I’m terribly sorry, but I am trying my best to satisfy your dining needs. If you don’t feel that my service is adequate, please feel free to request another waiter.”

(I walk away to take care of my other tables. Shortly thereafter, the owner calls me over.)

Owner: “What did you say to those people?”

Me: *repeat the story to him*

Owner: “Okay, who sat them?”

Me: “I don’t know. They just showed up. I thought a hostess did.”

Owner, to hostess: “Who sat that couple?”

Hostess: “They sat themselves.”

Owner, to customers: “You sat yourselves while we have a 20 minute wait?”

Customers: “Well, there was an empty table!”

Owner: “Get the f*** out of my restaurant!”