Stupid Guest Tricks

This didn't really fit in the "Other Theme Parks" category -- though my workplace sometimes resembles one -- so I'm posting it here, even though it's a golden example of stupidity.

I was chatting with one of our City Marshals today. Among other things, they handle court security. This particular marshal was working the metal detector at the court entrance, going through the "empty your pockets of all metal items and put them in this tray" routine with everyone.

One particularly fine specimen of idiotus criminalus walks up and starts emptying his pockets into the tray: keys, cell phone, baggie full of marijuana...

The marshal looks up at the guy, momentarily speechless -- and the guy reflexively says, "That's not mine."

[INDENT]Marshal: You just took this out of your pants pocket.
Idiot: ... These aren't my pants. [/INDENT]

Later, with the doofus in custody, he denies having any prior drug charges. The marshal runs his record and finds several possession convictions in another jurisdiction.

When confronted with these other convictions, Mr. Brainiac says, "Oh. Yeah. Those weren't mine, either." :D:

Well, coming up with "These aren't my pants" that quick should have been partial proof that he hadn't had any of his pocket stash recently.

Seriously I don't go into a courtroom with my wallet(with chain attached) or my camera phone. Why the hell would ANYBODY go in with a bag of weed?

All i have to say is......

CujoSR wrote:Seriously I don't go into a courtroom with my wallet(with chain attached) or my camera phone. Why the hell would ANYBODY go in with a bag of weed?

umm, smoke break?

hehehhehee

Further proof that street drugs should never be legalized--there's a reason it's called "dope"--because it makes you one! As if most Americans weren't bone-headed enough, that can make us a nation of Darwin award winners.

felinefan wrote:Further proof that street drugs should never be legalized--there's a reason it's called "dope"--because it makes you one! As if most Americans weren't bone-headed enough, that can make us a nation of Darwin award winners.

I think we have already reached that point. We do have http://www.dumbcriminals.com/ after all.

felinefan wrote:As if most Americans weren't bone-headed enough.

Exactly!

felinefan wrote:Further proof that street drugs should never be legalized--there's a reason it's called "dope"--because it makes you one! As if most Americans weren't bone-headed enough, that can make us a nation of Darwin award winners.

Maui is looking at a dramatic reduction in the population if California legalizes pot.

hobie16 wrote:Maui is looking at a dramatic reduction in the population if California legalizes pot.

Yayyy! I've always loved Maui. If everyone moves away maybe the price of housing will come down and I can afford to buy a place on the lower slopes of Haleakala amongst the grassy pastures and eucalyptus trees. Now THAT'S paradise. :)