Stupid Guest Tricks

. . .condensed soup. Cause I do not want to remember these people in my regular trip report that I write to remember the good stuff.

I may forget people at first and add them as I continue to remember them- you all know by this point how my brain works (or doesn't- maybe a more accurate assessment) so here we go.

Day 1. . .

Stupid Traveler Tricks: Before we even get on the plane:

-The family in front of us at check-in- and the employee helping them- nearly made a bunch of people miss their flights because they had about a dozen pieces of luggage to check between them and NO ONE had filled out a SINGLE luggage tag. Apparently they had trouble remembering where they lived too because writing them out took an eternity.

-The Airline employee, who, instead of taking care of other people while said family did their luggage tag filling out- let the line back up while she teased the four year old that she had to have a drivers license to show to board the plane if she wanted to go see Mickey Mouse *bangs head against wall*

We ended up letting a couple ladies trying to make an international flight swap places in line with us and as a result, got way behind. Going through security is such a work out and ordeal for me- taking off the shoes, handing over the crutch, getting it all back together, etc that I almost pulled my very own stupid trick- I didn't realize by the time we got thru security (Which also took for-e-ver) that it was almost time to board.

We did not realize this until we sat down with our McD's breakfast and I look out the windows at how bright it now was and ask my husband, "Um, what time is it?" I thought he was keeping track.

He was not.

Turned out we had 15 minutes to get to the gate before they began boarding- and we were at the other end of the huge terminal. Luckily we caught the tram and we were able to board as soon as we got there- no waiting at the gate (which I do hate) but it's a good thing that I didn't pull my own stupid traveler trick and end up with us missing our plane or this story would not be the amusing cautionary tale it now is LOL

Next Stupid Traveler Trick- the man in the row behind me who let his child continuously kick my chair- through the whole boarding process before the plane even took off. His wife was sitting across the row in her own little world and he had the two little boys with him, with him in the middle in the seat behind my husband- and he knew damn well the kid was kicking the hell out of my seat.

I looked over my shoulder- he knew I was also aware of the kicking then-but still I waited to see if he would finally tell the kid to stop. He did not. Finally just before take-off I stood up, turned around, and looked at the kid (Who was about 4) and I said, "Hi! Honey, I have to ask you to do me a big favor, OK? I have big boo-boos in my back, and when you kick my chair, it really, really hurts me." I now glanced at the father then back to the kid, still smiling quite pleasantly. "So if you could do me a big favor and not kick my chair, then I won't have owies."

Of course Kid looked at the floor, father looked at me like he wished I'd vaporize- but kid quit kicking the dissolving discs of my lumbar spine. For the most part.

I made a little small talk with the boys after that- asking if it was their first trip to see Mickey- I even suggested to the dad that they should get first time visitor buttons- trying to let him know I wasn't a shrew- but there was no way that I could go thru 2 1/2 hours of some kids toes right in my damaged spine.

The rest of our flight was, literally, a joy and a blessing and unbelievably, one of the highlights of our whole trip because of the family seated with us. But that is a story for my 'happy' trip report.

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Magic Kingdom- how can you be so crabby in such a happy place?

I think I found the only mean, angry British tourist in the history of WDW.

My husband had never been on HM in his life- he's only been to WDW a handful of times and he was scared as a kid and his parents didn't push him- but he wanted to go this time. I've only been on it once and that was about four years ago- so I had no memory of the way the queue worked- and I had never been taken in the back entrance with the wheelchair parties before who were transferring.

We had a family in front of us who seemed to be cranky overall- but one guy in their party just radiated 'big and tough'. I tried to distance myself from him but they kept shuffling positions as to who in their party was where as we moved thru the hallway and toward the stretching room.

My working eye was struggling to adjust to the dim lighting after the bright sunlight outside and after the flashes of lightning and all in the stretching room- I was shocked to discover when the doors opened leading out toward the ride car loading area that I was completely unable to see. At ALL.

So I clutched my DH's arm and I said, "I am totally blind in here, you have to help me or I'll kill somebody."

He was leading me forward and I was trying to find a wall to travel along but a crush of people from another stretching room (I think) came in behind us in the queue area and I was just about freaking out. Suddenly I had no idea where I was going- and my poor husband had no idea how the lines worked never having been there before.

The area narrows at some point- right before you get to the buggys I think he said it was- and I realized that I was about to be crushed by the people coming in behind me. The party ahead of us kept shuffling/meandering and wasn't really paying attention- they didn't seem to care if they kept together as a group. I knew the cars loaded continuously so I was in no hurry to get to the front or anything. I was just scared to death because it was my first time being thrust into a situation where I couldn't see at all in a huge crowd of people.

It was completely terrifying.

We get to a point where suddenly, I feel an opening to my left and I step into it- my husband right behind me and next thing I know Angry Big British Man is screaming at me.

"There IS a QUEUE here you know!" He shouts at me, and I swear, I was so shocked I nearly burst into tears. I wanted to tell him that I wasn't trying to cut him off, that I couldn't see- but I didn't get the chance he stormed up the platform and was in a buggy and he was gone.

I couldn't see anything of the ride at all, I just put my head on my husband's shoulder and cried waited for it to be over :(

When we got off the ride, there was Angry Man. I wanted to tell him that I was sorry- I didn't mean to cut him off but I was now blinded again by the bright sunlight and his party almost ran me over backing up the ECV they had in their group as my DH led me to my chair. Then they were gone.

It took me a long time to shake off the experience- I still wish I could have told him I didn't mean to cut into his party- I mean there was nowhere for us to go anyway they had so many people there was no way we were going to try to get around them (we're not line jumping types anyway!)

Lesson learned- if you're visually impaired, be sure that whoever is leading you knows where they're going or ask for help from a CM. Cause other guests will assume the worst about you (even though I have to think that it had to be evident to anyone around us that I was being led by the arm like a blind woman and couldn't see where I was going) . . .and they will eat you alive.

A scary experience -later that night after our dinner at Cali Grill I was not feeling well at all and wanted to get back to the room in a hurry (Wasn't the food btw, it was me. the food was amazing.)

We went to the monorail station- a train pulls in and the doors open and we hear someone screaming "Call 911!"

To which the CM runs as fast as he can to the other end of the train screaming, "What is the emergency?"

"CALL 911!" the guests repeat.

"WHAT is the EMERGENCY???!" CM shouts again while calling for assistance. This happened at least half a dozen times before he got to them. It was scary.

As we were backing into the elevator- knowing we'd need to get a cab instead, we heard "Is she breathing?" then- "She passed out" and "We need water" "We need oxygen!" and this was all from guests surrounding whoever was passed out. Just chaos.

My heart went out to the poor monorail CM, and as we left we saw the EMS guys heading up from the lobby. . .I hope whoever it was, was okay in the end.

Bru

WOW, GOOD report. (SG stuff that is!)

IT seemed almost like Murphays law, you have back problems, and the seat kicker is right behind you!

The HM thing shows a "perfect" SG! He was with someone that had to do an alternate enterence, WITH YOU! and didn't figure out that you needed some SLACK on boarding. What an ass!

Don't let the (Blank) get ya down!!

have some RUM, relax!!

Okay- quickly here's an overview. I can elaborate (or not) as it interests folks to hear:

SGT: Woman tells me during bus ride that another woman in their Grand Gatherings party made her kid um, relieve himself, into a cup in front of the castle because the fireworks were just about to start and the woman refused to take the child because the 'timing was bad'. I don't know who was more upset, me after hearing the story (all the while smiling politely and nodding because I didn't want to start a brawl by saying what I was thinking) or the woman who was ratted out by her relative LOL. She said "You didn't tell her that story, did you???" Then she started trying to justify the action saying "no one could see what was going on" (Just as wishes is starting? I beg to differ! It's not as dark as before Illuminations, you can see!) She said that they 'discreetly disposed of it" I'm thinking, how? Throwing the cup into a trash can??? There are bathrooms for a REASON! GAH!!!!!!!!!! It's not sanitary!!! Did she have him wash his hands? did she wash hers??? Doubtful! GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

They were also talking about having kids sleeping on the floors of their rooms at the GF- I had to wonder how many of their kids were declared on the reservations.

I felt so sorry for that little boy. What a memory to have of your mother making you humiliate yourself like that right in front of the castle. He'll talk about that in therapy some day.

SGT: Hellies abound. 'Nuf said.

SGT: tourists beside us loudly discussing and then declaring to crowd just before Wishes started that Tinkerbell was in fact a man. I said, "Of course she's not, she's a fairy!" and they just laughed.

SGT: Person who drained their can of tuna fish into a DRINKING FOUNTAIN in Adventureland-leaving behind bits of tuna in the drain, my husband said after seeing her do it. If I hadn't already been feeling queasy that day (and I do not care for tuna as it is) I would have tried to clean it up to spare the CM's

SGT: Line jumpers at Test Track (I posted about this in another thread already)

I know I'm forgetting some. . .

And the WORST one of all (though the potty story was the most horrific and a biohazard!)- with this one- I had to say something- the parents allowing each of their children to weigh themselves in turn on the baggage scale at the airline check in desk- which was bad enough the kids were big- but then allowed all THREE of them- totaling more than 285 pounds- to all stand on the scale together and start JUMPING up and DOWN on it!!!

We were next in line- I was feeling like crud and ready to get rid of our luggage- and I had visions of being told we couldn't use the check in because her brats broke the scale. Finally I said "I'm sorry, but I'm next to check in and I do not feel well today. If I can't check in my bags because you broke the scale, I am not going to be a happy person."

It is so unlike me to be so blunt with people (must have been the virus talking- yeah- that's it!) but I was at my wits end. We already had to deal with my chair and all that being disabled entails when you're traveling, and this woman was just ignoring her children's horrid behavior while the husband jawed with the bellhop (whom, I think, had been stiffed by them on a tip and was likely waiting around for them to fork over LOL)

Finally, the woman, not even turning or acknowledging me, said "Get down." and the kids proceeded to jump on to the golf cart of the bellguy and start hanging off of the canopy like monkeys. One of these kids was a teenager! The CM's, who were not saying anything because they're not supposed to (I confirmed that with another CM later) finally had to tell them to get down.

I don't want to start a war so I won't say where from- but I will say that three specific states were on school break over the time we were there- and as soon as the one group arrived- we knew it. The whole mood in the parks changed- everyone was short and rude and angry- and we literally got to the studios one morning, turned around, and left- it was so bad.

We were actually longing for the high school groups to come back- that's how bad it was- and it was because of rude parents with even ruder children.

SGT: Stiffing the skycap on the tip when you check in at resort airline check in. If your bags go to Hawaii, don't blame the airline. Blame your own cheap *ss. Esp. when they're staying at the grand and checking in for first class seats- it kills me. We save up for years to stay there and fly coach- and we still tip VERY well!!!

I'm sure more stories will come to me- those are the ones that jump out for now.

Discuss LOL

Bru

The HM thing shows a "perfect" SG! He was with someone that had to do an alternate enterence, WITH YOU! and didn't figure out that you needed some SLACK on boarding. What an ass!

Don't let the (Blank) get ya down!!

have some RUM, relax!!

Aww, thanks Pirate! You know, that is exactly what my DH said- the guy had someone in their party who needed special help- you'd have thought he'd be more sympathetic!

I do not drink as a general rule, but I swear that I thought of you recommending Rum to calm the nerves on a WDW trip while we were there- and by mid-trip, I did have a whole glass of wine at dinner one night (it DID help, and DH even tasted it! LOL) and we did share the little bottle of champagne another night that the GF Staff sent to us as an anniversary pressie. They were so good to us! So contrary to what I had thought before, there is even a time and place for a little wine (now that I'm not on any conflicting medications- I have the luxury! ;)

I had a really hard time shaking the HM experience off- but managed to thanks to my DH's quick thinking and a little help from another of your pirate brethren, Jack Sparrow. . .whose interaction with me, while literally lasting a nano-second, was one of the most memorable moments of our trip in the parks.

More on that story in the regular trip report ;)

Bru

February wrote:Aww, thanks Pirate! You know, that is exactly what my DH said- the guy had someone in their party who needed special help- you'd have thought he'd be more sympathetic!

I do not drink as a general rule, but I swear that I thought of you recommending Rum to calm the nerves on a WDW trip while we were there- and by mid-trip, I did have a whole glass of wine at dinner one night (it DID help, and DH even tasted it! LOL) and we did share the little bottle of champagne another night that the GF Staff sent to us as an anniversary pressie. They were so good to us! So contrary to what I had thought before, there is even a time and place for a little wine (now that I'm not on any conflicting medications- I have the luxury! ;)

I had a really hard time shaking the HM experience off- but managed to thanks to my DH's quick thinking and a little help from another of your pirate brethren, Jack Sparrow. . .whose interaction with me, while literally lasting a nano-second, was one of the most memorable moments of our trip in the parks.

More on that story in the regular trip report ;)

Bru

That is good, sometimes a little wine can make you feel better!

And me pirate brethern ALWAYS be looki'n out fer Wenches!!!

hehehehehe

Okay, so now I can't stand it, I have to tell the Jack story here even though it goes with the 'good' ones later.

Knowing that my spirits were flagging after the HM experience- My husband wheeled me toward Adventureland.

He was thinking only one thing; Pirates :D

I knew that we'd missed the last Sparrow show for the day- he knows Jack is my favorite- and so he says, "Well it's not quite over yet. I have an idea."

Then he told me that on our previous trip he paid attention to how the show was staged, where Jack ran at the end- which doors he vanished through. "Maybe if I put you somewhere over there . . ." he said, bringing me to a stop a ways from the doors (before you say anything, we were WELL out of the way- we did NOT want to crowd the man or worse- block his way, obviously! We're not SG's LOL) We were well out of the way,

"As he runs by, maybe he'll give you a high five." he said. Then DH added that he had seen Jack high-five people in the crowd as he ran on a previous visit= something he saw as he stood back to take pictures. I thought that it would be fun to watch him run by, regardless because his run always cracks me up no matter what.

Just as we came to a stop Jack and Mack were finishing up the show. Well, not a moment later I hear DH say "Okay, here he comes." and I'm looking up in the sunlight with my one decent eye, squinting, trying to see, and I see a big brown blur with dreads run by and I say , "Hey, hi Jack!"

Instead of running past, Jack skids to a stop, lurches forward toward my wheelchair, does that great 'drunken gesture' thing he does where he swings his arm way around dramatically, looks me over up and down and says to me:

"I will remember you."

Then he high-fived my husband and disappeared!

ROFL!!!

It was priceless! I don't know if he noticed my tri-colored hair (several streetmosphere actors played on it/commented on it- it was a hit) or the Product Red shirt I was wearing, which said "treasu(red)" on the front. But he definitely looked me over in a most in character, Jack like way and then made the remark- which my husband kept repeating to me gleefully for the rest of our trip. LOL

Needless to say, after that my spirits were once again, high. We'd already had two great interactions at park entrance soon as we arrived with two other Citizens of Main Street who remembered me from before- and then that. . .

Jack saved my day :) Thanks, Jack!!! We will remember YOU!

Bru

How was your soarin' experience? I know you said it was little better, but I need to know who I should give a backhand to when I get there. ;)

February wrote:Okay, so now I can't stand it, I have to tell the Jack story here even though it goes with the 'good' ones later.

Knowing that my spirits were flagging after the HM experience- My husband wheeled me toward Adventureland.

He was thinking only one thing; Pirates :D

I knew that we'd missed the last Sparrow show for the day- he knows Jack is my favorite- and so he says, "Well it's not quite over yet. I have an idea."

Then he told me that on our previous trip he paid attention to how the show was staged, where Jack ran at the end- which doors he vanished through. "Maybe if I put you somewhere over there . . ." he said, bringing me to a stop a ways from the doors (before you say anything, we were WELL out of the way- we did NOT want to crowd the man or worse- block his way, obviously! We're not SG's LOL) We were well out of the way,

"As he runs by, maybe he'll give you a high five." he said. Then DH added that he had seen Jack high-five people in the crowd as he ran on a previous visit= something he saw as he stood back to take pictures. I thought that it would be fun to watch him run by, regardless because his run always cracks me up no matter what.

Just as we came to a stop Jack and Mack were finishing up the show. Well, not a moment later I hear DH say "Okay, here he comes." and I'm looking up in the sunlight with my one decent eye, squinting, trying to see, and I see a big brown blur with dreads run by and I say , "Hey, hi Jack!"

Instead of running past, Jack skids to a stop, lurches forward toward my wheelchair, does that great 'drunken gesture' thing he does where he swings his arm way around dramatically, looks me over up and down and says to me:

"I will remember you."

Then he high-fived my husband and disappeared!

ROFL!!!

It was priceless! I don't know if he noticed my tri-colored hair (several streetmosphere actors played on it/commented on it- it was a hit) or the Product Red shirt I was wearing, which said "treasu(red)" on the front. But he definitely looked me over in a most in character, Jack like way and then made the remark- which my husband kept repeating to me gleefully for the rest of our trip. LOL

Needless to say, after that my spirits were once again, high. We'd already had two great interactions at park entrance soon as we arrived with two other Citizens of Main Street who remembered me from before- and then that. . .

Jack saved my day :) Thanks, Jack!!! We will remember YOU!

Bru

Ahh....a few seconds with Jack....I wish! :p:
There is a joke in here somewhere about my ex-husband, but I will refrain! :twisted:

February wrote:Okay, so now I can't stand it, I have to tell the Jack story here even though it goes with the 'good' ones later.

Knowing that my spirits were flagging after the HM experience- My husband wheeled me toward Adventureland.

He was thinking only one thing; Pirates :D

I knew that we'd missed the last Sparrow show for the day- he knows Jack is my favorite- and so he says, "Well it's not quite over yet. I have an idea."

Then he told me that on our previous trip he paid attention to how the show was staged, where Jack ran at the end- which doors he vanished through. "Maybe if I put you somewhere over there . . ." he said, bringing me to a stop a ways from the doors (before you say anything, we were WELL out of the way- we did NOT want to crowd the man or worse- block his way, obviously! We're not SG's LOL) We were well out of the way,

"As he runs by, maybe he'll give you a high five." he said. Then DH added that he had seen Jack high-five people in the crowd as he ran on a previous visit= something he saw as he stood back to take pictures. I thought that it would be fun to watch him run by, regardless because his run always cracks me up no matter what.

Just as we came to a stop Jack and Mack were finishing up the show. Well, not a moment later I hear DH say "Okay, here he comes." and I'm looking up in the sunlight with my one decent eye, squinting, trying to see, and I see a big brown blur with dreads run by and I say , "Hey, hi Jack!"

Instead of running past, Jack skids to a stop, lurches forward toward my wheelchair, does that great 'drunken gesture' thing he does where he swings his arm way around dramatically, looks me over up and down and says to me:

"I will remember you."

Then he high-fived my husband and disappeared!

ROFL!!!

It was priceless! I don't know if he noticed my tri-colored hair (several streetmosphere actors played on it/commented on it- it was a hit) or the Product Red shirt I was wearing, which said "treasu(red)" on the front. But he definitely looked me over in a most in character, Jack like way and then made the remark- which my husband kept repeating to me gleefully for the rest of our trip. LOL

Needless to say, after that my spirits were once again, high. We'd already had two great interactions at park entrance soon as we arrived with two other Citizens of Main Street who remembered me from before- and then that. . .

Jack saved my day :) Thanks, Jack!!! We will remember YOU!

Bru

SEE, Pirates stick together!!

(and it shows that the CM's ARE the best, at WDW or DLR!!)