Stupid Guest Tricks

Hope this topic takes off.

How many of you have ever gotten so tired, excited, or just plain tounge-tied (as I refer to it oral dislexia).

Here are a few of my greater oops! Hope you enjoy and can top them:

Jungle Cruise (elephant bathing pool): And that guy in his own private shower over there is Big Shit....Shot...Big Shot!

Jungle Cruise (exit spiel):
what I meant to say:"Okay folks rides over get up and get out and enjoy the rest of your day"
what I said: "Okay fucks rides over get up and get out....."
I hadn't even realized I said it until my back unloader says, "Oooooh Jim, did your hear what you just said!"

Soarin': "Ma'am you don't need your strap on during flight!"

Soarin': "Please take a seat so we can get you off quickly"

Soarin': "Thank you for flying with us it was our pleasure making you Soar"

Land boat ride (during aquacell rehab with no fish): I am supposed to be talking about expiramental fish farming, Aquaculture) even without fish in the tanks:

"Here we are experimenting with Aquapuncture (pause) (beat beat beat)we found out that it didn't relax the fish in quite the way we wanted, thats why we dont have any fish right now (laughing hystericaly at myself, blank stares from the 98% non english speaking guests on the tour)!"

Land boat ride (I had been pulled from my shift at GM test rack to cover call ins)
"Welcome aboard Living with the Land, presented by General Motors" (oops Nestle) "thats right folks we are about to go from zero to 2 knots in 15 seconds)

RnR Coaster ( I had been reading a guest shirt while sitting in launch-base and I had a habit of doing spiels in the "Parking Garage off and on" Usually please step in, sit down, store loose belongings behind your feet, and reach up and pull down on your restraint, once again step in sit down reach up pull down.) Unfortunaely for my at the end of the spiel I reapeted the guests shirt:
Get in Sit Down Shut up and Hold on (I still like this spiel better) :D:

We've got a running gag saying "Get in. Sit down. Shut up and enjoy the ride to the concert."

Its never speiled but (at unload)

"Get up, get the f*** off and enjoy the gift shop" or "We lied about the concert, welcome to the giftshop"

During The Parade:

"Please continue all the way through the walkway this is not a firework viewing area"

During the Fireworks

"Please continue all the way throught the walkway there is plenty of parade viewing in the middle of main street"

The closest I had once was with a guest wanting an extra bag while i was ringing them up, and I asked to see what they were gonna put inside (normally i would hand it over but i just recieved a lotta cr*p for doing that prior.) They said it was for their stuff in the car. I turned to check with my lead but she just left. Having hats to do I just handed it over and went to the machine and then it came out. "Yeah, I believe you guys. I mean i know if you lying to me you'll get hit by a car or something...". CLICKS what i just said. I try to recover and then "Oh..uhh..yah i kno that wasn't very Disney but this is California Adventure". CLICKS what i just said. So, I go to my last resort "Have a great night you guys!" :p:

Disgruntled Hatwriter wrote:... "Oh..uhh..yah i kno that wasn't very Disney but this is California Adventure" ...

Sometimes the truth just comes out when our guard is down!

Really funny post, thanx!! :D: :D:

At Book, I once said "and one house made out of 100% wolf proof pricks" no reaction from anyone on the boat.

Also, one time I described Toad Hall when I was at the Patchwork Quilt, realized it at the very end of my spiel looked, saw no confused looks so just continued on. The best part of this was at the end this one lady got off and told me that was the best trip she's ever had on Book. :) She apparantely wasn't listening to me.

At mansion trying to fill the ER...
"Step all the way inside filling all the dead space"
G: -mild laughs-
Me "I SEE DEAD SPACE" (in an attempt to fill the room didn't realise what I had said untill the room was laughing)

Also I have stumbled over my spiel and had to say "Let's try that again. Take 2"

At unload at mansion after returning to normal mode from creep mode
"Thank you for waiting 2 or 3 per..wait you are getting off now"

lady ulrike wrote:At Book, I once said "and one house made out of 100% wolf proof pricks" no reaction from anyone on the boat.

Also, one time I described Toad Hall when I was at the Patchwork Quilt, realized it at the very end of my spiel looked, saw no confused looks so just continued on. The best part of this was at the end this one lady got off and told me that was the best trip she's ever had on Book. :) She apparantely wasn't listening to me.

Why do I confuse every minature at Storybook with Toad Hall?! At least I'm not the only one. Or sometimes I repeat the same thing twice in a row because I'm watching everyone and their children. Nice part about the three little pigs houses! I've almost slipped before, but not to bad. When I talk about Prince Eric's ship, sometimes a guest looks at me again, no, I said ship not the other word.

Ooh! Safari Bloopers! I've had my share

- mixed up animal facts, gave a wingspan for an antelope
- repeated the same paragraph ... in one case, 3 times during one ride
- identified a duck as a hippo (the sun was in my eyes!)
- mixed up pink back pelicans and greater flamingos, ending up with either pink flamingos or greater pelicans. Also said "the greater flamingos have the lightest pink coloring of any pelican"

others I've heard but haven't said:

- identified termite mounds as thompson's gazelles
- claimed that elephants like to hide behind termite mounds
- claimed that a flamingo was the fastest land animal, running at up to 70 miles per hour
- confused black and white rhinos

I was working COP tonight, and well, I proved I needed sleep...

Me: Welcome ladies and gentlemen to Walt Disney's Carousel of Progress. Through out the presentation the carousel will be rotating so we ask that you please remain seated. I would also like to remind you that eating, drinking, smoking, flash photography, and video taping are PERMITTED.

I didn't realize what I had said until a guest told me she didn't want to be in the theater if people were going to be smoking.