I truly hope I don't qualify as a passhole considering I've only had an AP for a month, however, I felt I fit in this thread, as I am, after all, an Annual Passholder and have a passhole-like family member.
Last time I visited the park was with my 8-year-old cousin, Jennifer, earlier this month. Mind you, she has a reputation as the brattiest kid in our family. But being that I'd just gotten an AP, I figured it couldn't hurt for me to take her to Disneyland (she goes every summer). The rest of my family, with their two-day park hoppers, had planned their trips to the park around their time spent with Jennifer, so that they wouldn't be with her when she changed it to be the Crappiest Place on Earth.
When we went over to wait in line for the turnstiles, the whine-boiler was already bubbling. First, we did Indy and Splash, HM, Pirates, and Big Thunder. At least she was grateful she was old enough to use the Singles line (and that I knew of such thing), and that I knew where to stand in the ER at Mansion (don't worry, didn't push anyone out of the way), because she obviously HATES waiting in any kind of line. And it was about 8:45 when we had done those five rides.
In line for Jungle Cruise, we went upstairs and we were at the point where it split into two lines. The line on the right was full but the line on the left was empty up until it reached the stairs which you descend. So I started to walk into the left line and Jennifer pulled me back.
Jennifer: "We're not supposed to go in that line."
Me: "What makes you say that?"
Jennifer: "DUH, BECAUSE THERE'S NO ONE THERE."
I then explain that the people in the line on the right are obviously deprived of common sense as I drag her into the line on the left, considering that anyone could see the line was NOT roped off and that, smack dab on our left where the other set of stairs was, BOTH lines were full. We walk all the way around, back to the stairs we're supposed to descend (and the line finally fills up with the people behind us), and Jennifer glances at the people in the right-side line.
Jennifer: "Boy, those people must be really stupid."
What confuses me is how guests have no problem with stepping over ropes and chains, yet there is seemingly an invisible barrier preventing guests from using BOTH lines in a queue that splits into two.
At lunchtime, I ask her if she's hungry, and she replies yes. We go into the Village Haus and she takes one look at the huge lines.
Jennifer: "I'm not hungry anymore."
Me: "Okay, well, you can sit over there and wait while I wait in line and order MY lunch because I'm starving."
Jennifer: "I'll have a cheeseburger."
Later, shortly after dinner:
Jennifer: "I want to go on the Autopia!"
Me: "Okay. It says the Stand-by wait is 45 minutes, do you want to wait in the Stand-by line?"
Jennifer: "No, let's get Fastpasses."
*we get Fastpasses. 5 minutes later:*
Me: "Okay, so what do you want to do now?"
Jennifer: "I want to go on the Autopia!"
Me: "But we have to wait until our Fastpasses are valid."
Jennifer: "But I don't WANT to wait, I want to go on NOW!"
Me: "But you said you didn't want to wait in line! Pick something else."
Jennifer: "Fireworks."
Me: "They don't start until 9:30. It's 7:00."
Jennifer: "Okay, how about the Autopia?"
At this point I'm starting to think she and Dory from Finding Nemo should form a club.
We finally get to ride the Autopia:
Jennifer: "I want to drive!"
(She's about five inches too short.)
Me: "No, I don't think you're tall enough. But if you want I can press the pedal and you can steer."
Jennifer: "No, I want to do it by myself."
Me: "Fine."
After trying to put up with a few, "BUT I WANT THE GOLD CAR!" screams, we finally get in our supposedly "boring" red car and she struggles to reach the pedal. (Has to squat down in her seat, which I knew would happen. Hate to say "I told you so." So I didn't, I merely hinted it.
) CM motions for us to go.
Jennifer: "COME ON, she's telling us to go!"
Me: *pressing pedal* "I know, but you said you wanted to drive."
Jennifer: "No, I didn't!"
After about 20 seconds of driving, she shoves my hands off she steering wheel.
Jennifer: "I said I wanted to drive!"
She's dead tired at about 9:20 and we're struggling to get from Tomorrowland over to Main Street to meet our grandmother so we can watch the Fireworks together. Of course, crowds are insane but we finally managed to reach the Plaza Inn (more difficult because we're supposed to stay to the right). Grandmother's nowhere to be seen (we were actually supposed to get to one of the benches but it was hardly possible and the fireworks were about to start), so I just bring her to the top of a small set of stairs outside the Plaza Inn and she's whining her butt off.
Jennifer: "Where's Nana?!"
Me: "It's way too hard to get to her, the crowds are huge."
Jennifer: "Well, it's not the same without her!"
*I spend about 30 seconds pondering why almost every single attraction is okay without our grandmother, yet the fireworks are not.*
Jennifer, placing her forehead on the stair railing and facing the ground at the beginning of the fireworks show, continuously mumbles about not being with her grandmother, but looks up when Tinkerbell comes, she recognizes the music, or there is a loud explosion. After the Pirates of the Caribbean sequence, she's 100% focused on the show. I look at her face and she, with her mouth agape, is undeniably amazed. After the show is over:
Me: "Wow, wasn't that awesome?!"
Jennifer: "I hate it. Can we go now?"
Me: "YES. THANK YOU."