Stupid Guest Tricks

Big Wallaby wrote:If you want to take drugs that will kill you over time or cause you to do something to kill yourself, that's fine with me.

I have to respectifully disagree. Most of the motor vehicle deaths here are caused by drivers being drunk, stoned or whacked out on meth. The only exception is the occasional tourist that's never seen an ocean before.

hobie16 wrote:Youth and exuberance (???) can always be overcome by age and deceit.

Sorry hobie. It goes "Old age and Treachery,will 'ALWAYS' beat youth and exuberance". btw,none of those snot-nosed kids work there anymore.
Hopefully when they get out of jail,or see a proctologist,they might figure it out. :(

darph nader wrote:Hopefully when they get out of jail,or see a proctologist,they might figure it out. :(

So, I walk into the receiving department to pick up some stuff. One of the receiving clerks says, "We received a box with something inside we can't identify. Could you take a look and see if you know what it is?"

Always being up for a challenge, I say sure. Two other clerks join us as we open the box. Inside is an endoscope used for colonoscopies. I tell them what it is and what it's used for. I point out the light, video camera and air port.

"How does it work?" they ask.

“It’s inserted into the rectum (they cry “NOOOO!!”) and slid through the lower bowel (“All three feet? NOOOOOOOO!!!”). Air is used to expand the bowel so any polyps can be found (“NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!”).”

“How do you know this?” they ask.

“I’m over fifty.” I reply.

hobie16 wrote:“It’s inserted into the rectum (they cry “NOOOO!!”) and slid through the lower bowel (“All three feet? NOOOOOOOO!!!”). Air is used to expand the bowel so any polyps can be found (“NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!”).”

This is the procedure Bush will have tomorow. Leno said Drs. will find his head. :D:

Main Streeter wrote:This is the procedure Bush will have tomorow. Leno said Drs. will find his head. :D:

The scary part is not them finding his brain there but that Cheney will be in charge or the country. I hope he does not shoot anything while he is in charge. I have online friends who hate Bush but they are hoping he survives and is back in office soon. We can talk about Cheney here because he is the ultimate SG.

And now I have to tell you about the morning after my wedding night. My dad, being in the hotel industry in Portland, has connections. For that reason, Liz and I were able to stay in the Presidential Suite at Embassy Suites at the Portland Airport.

The next morning, we're on the way to the airport when I receive a call. My mom just wanted to make sure we were up (which we were) so we wouldn't miss the flight out.

Mom: "Did you like the room?"
Me: "Yes, it was very nice."
Mom: "Was the bed nice?"
Me: "Yes, it was one of the nicest beds I've ever slept on."
Mom: "Well, that's good, since Dick Cheney slept there last night."

Oh, thanks, mom. Actually, and not to get into a political fight, I have no problem with Cheney. But still, he's about the most boring person I know of. I don't want to know that I spent my wedding night sleeping between the same sheets as he did.

hobie16 wrote:I have to respectifully disagree. Most of the motor vehicle deaths here are caused by drivers being drunk, stoned or whacked out on meth. The only exception is the occasional tourist that's never seen an ocean before.

I'm sorry, I seem to have forgotten the most important clause: If you're going to do that stuff, do it in a way that doesn't affect my life, or that of anyone around you, except the people who love you that you knowingly hurt while doing what you do. And for that, if you choose to do those things, you are the worst kind of idiot.

Big Wallaby wrote: Mom: "Well, that's good, since Dick Cheney slept there last night."

COOTIES!!!!

I wondered what that itching feeling was...

Big Wallaby wrote:Mom: "Well, that's good, since Dick Cheney slept there last night."

Liz just noticed something rather important to this story...

Dick Cheney was not in the room with us. He had been there the night before us, not with us.

Please update your reading of the story accordingly.