Stupid Guest Tricks

Fat guy in a little coat...

Syndrome wrote:Syndrome's Sidewalk Bully Plan:

1) Get a water bottle with a pointy neck.

2) Carry bottle at all times when at WDW.

3) When group of SG Sidewalk Bullies approaches, place bottom of bottle against your body with neck sticking out and facing SGs.

4) Keep walking assertively towards them, keeping bottle in prime poke position.

5) Marvel at how quickly they can part to make room for you when their personal safety/comfort is at stake.

I learned this by accident one summer when I was nearly trampled by a herd of Brazillian teens. When I held the bottle in defensive position they parted like the Red Sea. Now I use it for a variety of purposes. Besides sidewalks, it's a great way to teach kids in queue lines who keep bumping into you to respect your personal space. Just hold it against your hip or other appropriate place and watch them punish themselves.

I likee! I am going to use this one from now on! Good tip Syndrome!

Zazu wrote:The worst place for sidewalk hogs seems to be Downtown Disney, especially the sidewalk past Pleasure Island in the early evenings.

My approach is to first place SWMBO behind me. If I don't, her sharp tongue may start more than I care to finish.

Second, I move to the right edge of the sidewalk.

Third, I stop just before collision.

Fourth, I employ the skills I learned as a lineman back in high school football.

Finally, look down with an expression of pity and suggest they watch where they're going in future. *Never* offer to help them up -- resume walking at once.


Only once have I needed more than this. It was a summer evening about 7:30, and the kids had decided to congregate in front of the local theater. All over the front of the theater. I checked, and they hadn't left a single path to the parking lot.

So, I chose the thinnest spot in the crowd, and headed for it shouting, "Pardon me! Coming through! Gangway!" over and over until I was obliged to knock two of them down to get through.

Was I worried about having 100 teens angry with me? Not for a moment. You see, I'm (way) over 40, and thus am completely invisible!!!

The young ones here have NO idea how true this is! It does not happen to them. We don't exist, right? We oldsters do not exist in this dimension anymore, really. Happens immediately on your 40th birthday! You somehow have become invisible! Funny how that happens. Hehehe, til we don't move and run em down like deer caught in the headlights and they never know what hit them.

I don't move when 3-4 people are walking abreast on a sidewalk and I am coming from the opposite direction. I WON'T move. I stare them down and they move first or they hit the ground. I am a raging menopausal immovable force! :twisted: They have no right to force someone into a street or hedge or whatever.
It is really easy when I am on the ECV. Crowds part like the red sea! They are afraid of those suckers, even if people who do not abuse them like me are on them. And I am a great driver on it. I do NOT abuse the ECV. I only put it on racing speed when there is no one around, early in the morning around the hotel grounds or late at nite in DtD or the hotel grounds at DLR! Lots of space and fast ridin'! It is fun to crank it up to 9 MPH! <snicker>

Syndrome wrote:This is a good strategy on the Disney ship when big groups of teens (and sometimes groups of kids including their rude idiot parents) decide that the main staircases are actually chairs in disguise. I've seen other people complain that "Excuse me" or indirect mumbled comments don't work. Of course not! You have to appeal to their sense of self preservation. I just yell, "Coming through!" while continuing at a brisk, no-nonsense pace that backs up the tone of my words. Only rarely do I actually have to trample anyone...they tend to move pretty quickly.

I like this, I am going to have to remember this next year on our cruise. Thanks for yet another great tip for the cruise line!

RAGING MENOPAUSAL SHE DEVIL COMING THROUGH!!!!

heeheehee...

sues

hobie16 wrote:

As of a couple of years ago, when I still worked at USH, the Deathmobile could still be seen on exhibit in a prop car parking lot on the back lot during the Tram tour. I think that was where they put The Fast and the Furious (not sure though,) so I don't know if it's still there.

hobie16 wrote:Rule #5: Stop and let them walk around you.

Yeah, that is a good idea, but by stopping, you're not walking any more, which is also as good as giving up ;)

I just don't understand how so many people (sidewalk hoggers) can be so indifferent to the people around them. I guess they were just raised incorrectly or something. The stuff I've witnessed makes me really wonder sometimes; why can't you just smile and people will part the way? BTW, I also equate this behavior (blocking sidewalks) with deep-seated stupidity. My assumption is that these people probably have IQs in the low 90s.

in the single digits... ;)

Princess Susi wrote: RAGING MENOPAUSAL SHE DEVIL COMING THROUGH!!!!

heeheehee...

I love it! That's going to be my excuse! Actually for me it's perimenopause. My gynie told me I had that last year, so I have medical backing for my bitchiness. If I've gotten turn into an old fart, I'm gonna milk all the advantages/excuses out of it that I can.

Princess Susi wrote:It is really easy when I am on the ECV. Crowds part like the red sea! They are afraid of those suckers, even if people who do not abuse them like me are on them. And I am a great driver on it. I do NOT abuse the ECV. I only put it on racing speed when there is no one around, early in the morning around the hotel grounds or late at nite in DtD or the hotel grounds at DLR! Lots of space and fast ridin'! It is fun to crank it up to 9 MPH!

I'm a big ugly biker. One stare from me makes the biggest people move out of the way. That and the "teacher" stare that I have developed.

:twisted: