Stupid Guest Tricks

susislicker wrote:Some of the stories of door to door sales are great!

It's not sales, just a starving student story. Remember, you asked.

I got a summer job giving door-to-door surveys for the state. Every day we were given a question to ask and a neighborhood to target. One day my question was: What kind of birth control do you use?

I went to the first house and knocked on the door. When the lady answered, I showed her my ID, explained what I was doing, and asked my question. She said she used the pill. I marked that answer on my response form, said thank you and went to the next house.

After going through the process at the next house the lady replied that she used spermicidal foam. I marked that answer on my response form, said thank you and went to the next house.

After going through the process at the third house the lady replied, “I use the Bug Eyed Bucket Method.”

Not seeing this particular method on the response form and thinking she may have been kidding, I said, “Lady, I’ve never heard of that particular method and it’s not on my response form. Can you give me a description?”

“Sure,” she replied, “As you can see I stand about six feet tall but my husband is only five foot one. When we make love, we do it standing up and he stands on a bucket. When he gets bug eyed, I kick the bucket out from under him.”

ROFLMAO!! That's a good one, hobie!

The "Bug Eyed Bucket Method", gotta remember that one!

hobie16 wrote:It's not sales, just a starving student story. Remember, you asked.

I got a summer job giving door-to-door surveys for the state. Every day we were given a question to ask and a neighborhood to target. One day my question was: What kind of birth control do you use?

I went to the first house and knocked on the door. When the lady answered, I showed her my ID, explained what I was doing, and asked my question. She said she used the pill. I marked that answer on my response form, said thank you and went to the next house.

After going through the process at the next house the lady replied that she used spermicidal foam. I marked that answer on my response form, said thank you and went to the next house.

After going through the process at the third house the lady replied, “I use the Bug Eyed Bucket Method.”

Not seeing this particular method on the response form and thinking she may have been kidding, I said, “Lady, I’ve never heard of that particular method and it’s not on my response form. Can you give me a description?”

“Sure,” she replied, “As you can see I stand about six feet tall but my husband is only five foot one. When we make love, we do it standing up and he stands on a bucket. When he gets bug eyed, I kick the bucket out from under him.”

:D: :D: :D: :D: :D: :D: Too Funny!
Hey, wait a minute- you weren't that guy who got arrested for doing "door-to-door gynecological exams, were you??????? :p:

DisneyMom wrote:Hey, wait a minute- you weren't that guy who got arrested for doing "door-to-door gynecological exams, were you???????

Nope, not me. I was in, ummm, Timbuktu. Yeah, that's it, Timbuktu.

I did read a story about a guy who filed a police report complaining every time the cable guy came by to do his weekly signal strength inspection he also gave him a colonoscopy. The complaint stated he always intended to ask why but by the time the sedative wears off, the cable guy was already gone.

[quote="Main Streeter"]AM SURE THIS WILL BE ON DARPH'S AGENDA AS SOON AS HE RETURNS.... broke. :D: BTW, his hotel rez was screwed up when I checked last night. The computer had no one by that name. I think this is waaaay funny. darph will be sleeping under the DLR sign on Harbor for 2 nights. Who says MY dreams don't come true? ]

Why can't he stay at your place ?

leftcoaster wrote:Why can't he stay at your place ?

Probably because darph would drink him out of house and home. :)

leftcoaster wrote:Why can't he stay at your place ?

Yeah, why not let him stay at the palatial Main Streeter Hotel? Two story suites, 500 count sheets, in room sauna, magnificent view, olympic size pool,
60 inch LCD TV and, Main Streeter at you beck and call. Who could ask for more?

hobie16 wrote:Yeah, why not let him stay at the palatial Main Streeter Hotel? Two story suites, 500 count sheets, in room sauna, magnificent view, olympic size pool,
60 inch LCD TV and, Main Streeter at you beck and call. Who could ask for more?

UUUHHH,other than beer,I WILL NOT answer that question! :twisted:

hobie16 wrote:Nope, not me. I was in, ummm, Timbuktu. Yeah, that's it, Timbuktu.

I did read a story about a guy who filed a police report complaining every time the cable guy came by to do his weekly signal strength inspection he also gave him a colonoscopy. The complaint stated he always intended to ask why but by the time the sedative wears off, the cable guy was already gone.

That wasn't Senator Craig's cable guy, was it?
That guy has the WORST luck!

[quote="Main Streeter"]Who says MY dreams don't come true? ]Now, is that because you made your own dreams come true? :p: :D: