Stupid Guest Tricks

Its not a HYS but its just a joking replay I make...

-Can I ask you a question/Can I look at your pins?
I don't know, can you?

-How do I get to (Enter attraction name)
By walking or having someone carry you there.

DisneyLover wrote:If this board is supposed to be for cast members only, then you should make it a private board.

We already have private boards for CMs only on a different website.

On this particular one, we allow people who are not CMs to see some of the "backstage" stuff that they don't normally see. Many non-CMs actually like seeing that sort of stuff, realizing full well that this is a board designed FOR THE SPECIFIC PURPOSE of allowing CMs to share stories that they wouldn't share onstage.

If the very name of this web site isn't a dead giveaway to that fact, then, well...

HERE'S YOUR SIGN!

IndyandMarion wrote:Its not a HYS but its just a joking replay I make...

-Can I ask you a question/Can I look at your pins?
I don't know, can you?

-How do I get to (Enter attraction name)
By walking or having someone carry you there.

Some of my favorites that I use:

Guest entering ride: Do you get wet?
Me: Nope, I stay perfectly dry.

Guest: Can you go on this ride if you're pregnant?
Me: If I'M pregnant?!?! I think I'd be too busy doing the morning talk show circuit!

Guest: How tall do you have to be to go on this ride?
Me: (deadpan) You have to be at least three inches tall.

Guest: How old do you have to be to go on this ride?
Me: Less than two hundred years old.

PirateJohn wrote:Some of my favorites that I use:
Guest: Can you go on this ride if you're pregnant?
Me: If I'M pregnant?!?! I think I'd be too busy doing the morning talk show circuit!

I think my answer would be along the lines of "Listen. If I was pregnant, going on the ride would be the LEAST of my worries" (Being that I am a male...)

PirateJohn wrote:Some of my favorites that I use:

Guest entering ride: Do you get wet?
Me: Nope, I stay perfectly dry.

Guest: Can you go on this ride if you're pregnant?
Me: If I'M pregnant?!?! I think I'd be too busy doing the morning talk show circuit!

Guest: How tall do you have to be to go on this ride?
Me: (deadpan) You have to be at least three inches tall.

Guest: How old do you have to be to go on this ride?
Me: Less than two hundred years old.

ROFLMAOPMP!

Obviously you know what they meant, but I'm sure that after a long day, sometimes those responses just slip out.

And of course, you get the "You know what I mean!" answer.

God love you CMs. I don't know if I could last 20 minutes on stage. That's why I would want a back stage job.

leftcoaster wrote:
God love you CMs. I don't know if I could last 20 minutes on stage. That's why I would want a back stage job.

Listen. There is only one place that is safe enough in the world, in the world! That you could work at and not worry about running into someone as stupid as these people are sometimes. And listen to me when I say that I've done the research myself in my own labs! That place is your bathroom in your own God damn house!

Backstage? SCREW YOU! OK!? Backstage is the worst place EVER to want to work. Why? Because when you deal with these gerbils onstage, that is carried with you backstage. During that time, your brain deterioriates and when you get around others backstage, YOU'RE SOUNDING AS IDIOTIC AS THOSE SCREWJOBS BACK ONSTAGE!

Case in point, even though I'm on vacation, I still get calls from friends at work (Because if they don't talk to someone on the outside world, they'll going f'n nuts!). I got a call the other day and said one of them said they overheard someone saying the line "If it weren't for my Parrot, I wouldn't have spent that year in college"

Listen to me when I say this, do not, DO NOT think about that for more than three seconds. Because if you do, they'll find you tomorrow dead in your bathroom from thinking too hard on the comment.

I'm almost to the point to where I believe that there is a group somewhere that trains people to act this stupid. We have homeland security (Which is the best f'n idea in the world), we have plenty of money (Despite our Country's big f'n cash deficient), we need to go after this group and just kick some ass. It might sound like a stupid idea, but we're talking about our government here. This is the same government that a few years back, gave the State of Georgia a $5 MILLION dollar check (For lack of better terms, because I don't have any more energy to think of stuff) to do whatever they want with. As we all know, EVERY SCHOOL AND ROAD IN THAT STATE OR ANY STATE is in perfect condition. So they use 3 million of it to fund a study to see why PEOPLE WANT TO BREAK OUT OF JAIL (Listen, I couldn't make this up!). If the government is willing to do that, then they should have enough money to fund my project!!

You see why I say your bathroom is the safest place to work now?! Ok, I think Im done.

Wendy Peffercorn wrote:Oh no... they pulled the "Im a shareholder" card.

Hows Oneshare.com treating you Disney lover?

The "I'm a shareholder" comment is my second favorite to "I spent 5000 dollars today and..." Every time I hear that I have the urge to say: "Sir/Ma'am, look at the other 30,000 people mingling in the park around you. Each of them has probably spent $5000 as well. Do you really think your $5000 means anything to us? No. Thankyou and have a Magical day."

well, this didnt take place at the disney parks, but at universal, at the great revenge of the mummy. while im standing at greeter, i have a woman come over to me and start yelling about how she never saw any signs saying that the ride was a high speed rollercoaster. funny part, she was standing right in front of the sign when she told me this. :D:

Anna wrote:well, this didnt take place at the disney parks, but at universal, at the great revenge of the mummy. while im standing at greeter, i have a woman come over to me and start yelling about how she never saw any signs saying that the ride was a high speed rollercoaster. funny part, she was standing right in front of the sign when she told me this. :D:

LOL :D: that reminds me of a time when someone came out to alcatraz and asked where the prision was

Main_Street_Merch wrote:Hows Oneshare.com treating you Disney lover?

The "I'm a shareholder" comment is my second favorite to "I spent 5000 dollars today and..." Every time I hear that I have the urge to say: "Sir/Ma'am, look at the other 30,000 people mingling in the park around you. Each of them has probably spent $5000 as well. Do you really think your $5000 means anything to us? No. Thankyou and have a Magical day."

I work for a city government -- we have the same reaction when someone tells us, "I'm a taxpayer, you know!" Yeah, buddy, join the club.