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Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Sat Aug 25, 2007 10:47 am
by BRWombat
Meltissa wrote:My cousin and his wife are total helicopter parents. They will not let their 7 year old son do anything without one of them being there. It got bad enough that their son one day turned to his mom and said "Why do you always have to be here? I can never do anything without you by my side"
On the opposite side, my wife & I always saw the value in letting our kids have time away from us early on -- starting in the church nursery. What's amazing is how the kids will reflect the parents: its not universally true, but those with a mom & dad reluctant to leave them seem to be the most likely to suffer separation anxiety.

Us? We wished for even a little separation anxiety sometimes. Our kids would take off into their room without a backwards glance most of the time!

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Sat Aug 25, 2007 7:31 pm
by Floridian
Opinion for someone currently in college...its the high schools fault. :rolleyes: Really though when I was in high school (which was not very long ago) anytime I went to speak with a guidance counselor about my grades or schedule or what I need to get done to get into college they would not help me. I was told that they would need to speak with a parent/guardian about this. Always bugged me because they were my classes and I was the one filling out the college applications, I am sure my mom would have helped if I asked but it was my stuff. So I at least partly blame that system for college students not taking charge of their own academic career.

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 12:07 pm
by bpgstudios
Floridian, I totally agree! The only way I ever got any help from "guidance councelors" in high school was to either bug them enough times or have a parent do it for them and pass it off to them to sign. I was told by my guidance councelor that they could not help me with anything more then the transcript request form to send to the college I applied to. I bet it has something to do with the fact they were probably sued for giving bad advice that cost some kid to not get accepted to their only choice college. :rolleyes:

I have a professor right now that runs his class like a buisness. His class motto: No Bullshit. I like it.

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 3:14 pm
by Cheshire Figment
bpgstudios wrote:I have a professor right now that runs his class like a business. His class motto: No Bullshit. I like it.
I think my best professor in college was in Political Science. The first day of class he made basically the following announcement:

I do not care where you sit. I do not take attendance. Mondays and Wednesdays I will be here, on Fridays my TA will be in and cover the assigned readings. On (and he gave dates) there will be exams; the only way to get a makeup is to have an iron-clad, gilt-edged excuse.

He was such a good instructor that every single day (and I took two semesters with him) every seat in the room was filled and there were usually people also standing in the back. In other words, he was so good that students not registered in the class would attend since they knew they would learn something.

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 9:11 pm
by Floridian
Cheshire Figment wrote: He was such a good instructor that every single day (and I took two semesters with him) every seat in the room was filled and there were usually people also standing in the back..
Thats the reason I am cautious of classes with mandatory attendance. It's not that I don't intend on going to class but you have to wonder what the lectures will be like if it was nesesary to implement mandatory attendance.

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 6:10 am
by leftcoaster
I have read stories where mothers even go on job interviews with their darlings. :eek:

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Wed Aug 29, 2007 2:24 am
by WildGrits
vixen101485 wrote:
Since her DD has never been away from her she wanted to know if it was ok for her to stay for the classes UNTIL she got used to being there. (that could be months) Teacher told her not a good idea.
Gee..........
Who's suffering from Separation Anxiety?

Go sit in your car and cry like the rest of us. Well, just us moms that don't know what to do with ourselves. :p:

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Wed Aug 29, 2007 7:45 am
by vixen101485
I plan on heading back home (it's a 5 minute walk)and having a celebration! LOL I might actually have time to get some housework done. Not that it will stay that way but... ;)

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Wed Aug 29, 2007 9:59 am
by ktulu
My daughter has been wanting to ride with me to her baby sitter in the morning. It sucks when I have to leave her (mostly because I don't want to drive my 23 miles to work, I'd rather stay at home and play!) but it is really hard when she starts to cry and doesn't want me to leave.

Re: Stupid Helicopter Parent Tricks

Posted: Wed Aug 29, 2007 12:07 pm
by ICStupidPeople
ktulu wrote:My daughter has been wanting to ride with me to her baby sitter in the morning. It sucks when I have to leave her (mostly because I don't want to drive my 23 miles to work, I'd rather stay at home and play!) but it is really hard when she starts to cry and doesn't want me to leave.
Um, Ktulu? They ALL do that. Have you ever peaked back in about 1 minute after you leave without her seeing you? I can guarantee she is off playing and over it. It's their way of trying to control a situation. The parents that say "oh, I can't leave my baby, it needs me" are actually the one that are relying on the baby to fulfill something for them. The baby will, from that moment on, control the rest of their lives.

These are the same parents that "co-sleep", "babywear", ect. They are also the parents of the child that is screaming or running or being generally horrible at the parks.

You're doing the right thing by letting her socialize. Children need to know that parents will leave, but they WILL come back. It makes them more well rounded. That is also considered "securely attatched". They have a sense of security. Kids that are never separated from their parents don't have that and become insecurely attached. If the parent were to ever leave, the child would have issues.