Jungle Cruise Pilot Frozen

[Zazu]

I was enjoying the Magic Kingdom as a guest last Sunday... along with about 25 close personal friends. (True!) We elected to take a jungle cruise and were given our own boat.

Christopher, our pilot, was good. *Very* good. He also realized that he had a boatload of regulars when we all recited the butterfly joke's punchline with him. "Ah," he said, "So it's to be one of *those* tours!" and proceeded to trot out rare and uncommon jokes to see if he could fake us all out. (He couldn't.)

There was a backup at the dock when we returned, and he stopped by Chief Nami to kill some time. He reminded us to take our small children with us lest they be glued to the floor at Small World and taught to sing an annoying song until puberty. He even admitted to having been one of those kids for seven years.

"You know that little hula girl at the top of the volcano? That was me," he claimed.

A member of the group immediately asked, "So, are you a virgin then?"

Turns out, this was not a question he was prepared to answer. Not in *any* way. He became completely speechless and turned a lovely shade of red that matched the stripes on Chief Nami's shorts.

Our group called out possible answers for him: "I'm a CPer. Duh!"
"I live at an apartment complex called Vista Lay, what do you think?"
"So... it's *true* what they say about how many cast members are gay?"
"Ashamed to say no, or embarrased to say yes?"
"Wait, you said you were the hula *GIRL*?!?"

He finally settled on, "The Walt Disney Company doesn't want me to answer that question," which was, at least, true.

Christoper, if you're reading this, thanks for a great show! And I hope you get the red out of your cheeks soon.

[GMC]

WORST SITUATION EVER!!! holy crap! I pissed myself just hearing it... Maybe that's why we're not allowed to use that one out here. Kudos to Christopher though, for a somewhat recovery, and thanks Zazu, now i'm prepared to answer that should the occasion arrive.

[Zazu]

Maybe that's why we're not allowed to use that one out here. Kudos to Christopher though, for a somewhat recovery, and thanks Zazu, now i'm prepared to answer that should the occasion arrive.

Just out of curiosity, how *would* you anser that question? :twisted:

[gurgi]

Just out of curiosity, how *would* you anser that question? :twisted:

Im an escaped Hoolah Girl masquerading as a boy on the jungle cruise..what do you think?

-or-
turn it around on them

Was that an offer?

[MagliteL13]

Im an escaped Hoolah Girl masquerading as a boy on the jungle cruise..what do you think?

-or-
turn it around on them

Was that an offer?

There's at least 5 or 6 skippers I can think of that would turn it around on them. All the skippers have different strengths with their spiels. He's really good with the groups that don't have any reactions and those that are usually between the ages of 18-30. Makes me wonder what spiel he was doing (we've all got a few characters). I actually rode his boat for the first time yesterday and thought he was hysterical. I mean, we're essentially telling the same jokes just in a different way.

"Oh you want to heckle me? Get out."
"Oh you want to heckle me--like you're the first person who's tried that."
"Oh you want to heckle me. Just remember I can make this better or wetter."
"Oh you want to heckle me. Shut up! ....Oh I'm soooooo sorry, where's my Disney hospitality?-- Shut up! And have a magical day."

--the last one only works if you proceed to over use the phrase 'And have a magical day.'