Skipper Gordon Returns With a Tale of Horror and Bloodshed.
Posted: Tue Dec 31, 2013 11:01 am
Hi guys! I haven't worked at Universal for almost 4 years now, so I figure it's safe to share some of my more "obvious identity" stories.
I was working at the Jaws ride at Universal Studios a few years ago and we had a bit of a pigeon problem. The ride was right next to the midway so it was a convenient place for snackies for pigeons and well...hawks. It was not uncommon for a hawk to swoop down in the middle of the courtyard and nail a pigeon in a violent and gristly fashion. It was awesome.
One such air raid took place just as a boat was unloading at the dock. The hawk was startled by the sudden arrival of 40 people on the scene and skeedaddled after landing what appeared to be a glancing blow. The pigeon took shelter behind one of the trash cans at the dock. This had happened before and led to a massive increase in the wait line because guests are dumb and, "OMG a pigeon! On the dock! TAKE A PICTURE!"
I grabbed a broom to shoo the bird away only to discover that it was having a massive seizure due to head trauma and was not long for this world. In an effort to spare the soon-to-arrive boat full of guests the sight of a slow and painful bird death, I donned my gloves and picked up the pigeon to snap its neck. Instead, the damn bird's head popped off! I screamed, drawing the attention of a nearby maintenance worker. He looked at me...then at the head on the ground..then at the bloody corpse in my hand...then back at my face. Then he uttered these immortal words in his trademark brooklyn accent, "Is that its fucking head?"
I couldn't help myself. I started laughing hysterically. Tears of horror and laughter were streaming down my face as I held this dead fucking pigeon in my hand. Then the next boat arrived. I shoved the body in the trash, kicked the head into hiding, hid my hands behind my back and plastered on a smile, "Hey guys! How was your boat tour?"
I was working at the Jaws ride at Universal Studios a few years ago and we had a bit of a pigeon problem. The ride was right next to the midway so it was a convenient place for snackies for pigeons and well...hawks. It was not uncommon for a hawk to swoop down in the middle of the courtyard and nail a pigeon in a violent and gristly fashion. It was awesome.
One such air raid took place just as a boat was unloading at the dock. The hawk was startled by the sudden arrival of 40 people on the scene and skeedaddled after landing what appeared to be a glancing blow. The pigeon took shelter behind one of the trash cans at the dock. This had happened before and led to a massive increase in the wait line because guests are dumb and, "OMG a pigeon! On the dock! TAKE A PICTURE!"
I grabbed a broom to shoo the bird away only to discover that it was having a massive seizure due to head trauma and was not long for this world. In an effort to spare the soon-to-arrive boat full of guests the sight of a slow and painful bird death, I donned my gloves and picked up the pigeon to snap its neck. Instead, the damn bird's head popped off! I screamed, drawing the attention of a nearby maintenance worker. He looked at me...then at the head on the ground..then at the bloody corpse in my hand...then back at my face. Then he uttered these immortal words in his trademark brooklyn accent, "Is that its fucking head?"
I couldn't help myself. I started laughing hysterically. Tears of horror and laughter were streaming down my face as I held this dead fucking pigeon in my hand. Then the next boat arrived. I shoved the body in the trash, kicked the head into hiding, hid my hands behind my back and plastered on a smile, "Hey guys! How was your boat tour?"