A Coming of Age Story

[hobie16]

I'd get into a cold rage where I didn't care if they hurt me, as long as I got to hurt them...

That happened to me once. We had the neighborhood bully who was about two years older then the rest of the kids. I can't remember what set me off but I saw red and went after him. I started throwing punches until I knocked him to the ground. I then crawled up him while still raining blows on him. He returned a few but I was numb to them. I finally ended up sitting on his chest still throwing blows. By now he was just trying to block them.

As suddenly as it started it ended. It was like someone stuck a pin in my balloon. I got off him fully expecting he would beat the crap out of me. Instead he ran down the street screaming like the sissy he really was. He never bothered anyone on the block again.

It only happened to me one time in my whole life. I sometimes wonder what it would take to set me off like that again. Hopefully, I never find out.

[DisneyMom]

That happened to me once. We had the neighborhood bully who was about two years older then the rest of the kids. I can't remember what set me off but I saw red and went after him. I started throwing punches until I knocked him to the ground. I then crawled up him while still raining blows on him. He returned a few but I was numb to them. I finally ended up sitting on his chest still throwing blows. By now he was just trying to block them.

As suddenly as it started it ended. It was like someone stuck a pin in my balloon. I got off him fully expecting he would beat the crap out of me. Instead he ran down the street screaming like the sissy he really was. He never bothered anyone on the block again.

It only happened to me one time in my whole life. I sometimes wonder what it would take to set me off like that again. Hopefully, I never find out.

Well, I hope nobody cuts in line in front of you at DLR!!!!!! :p:

[GaTechGal]

That happened to me once. We had the neighborhood bully who was about two years older then the rest of the kids. I can't remember what set me off but I saw red and went after him. I started throwing punches until I knocked him to the ground. I then crawled up him while still raining blows on him. He returned a few but I was numb to them. I finally ended up sitting on his chest still throwing blows. By now he was just trying to block them.

As suddenly as it started it ended. It was like someone stuck a pin in my balloon. I got off him fully expecting he would beat the crap out of me. Instead he ran down the street screaming like the sissy he really was. He never bothered anyone on the block again.

It only happened to me one time in my whole life. I sometimes wonder what it would take to set me off like that again. Hopefully, I never find out.

That sounds just like that scene in "A Christmas Story". Were you swearing the whole time?

[Zazu]

That's where extensive combat, preferably martial arts, comes in. I would rather the kids I will one day have be around to feel awful about shooting that guy who was coming after them. That's why we have psychologists.

Yes, far better that our kids (or ourselves) should need counseling than surgery ... or embalming.

[hobie16]

Well, I hope nobody cuts in line in front of you at DLR!!!!!! :p:

I've had a lot worse happen.

That sounds just like that scene in "A Christmas Story". Were you swearing the whole time?

Didn't say a word.

[Amphigorey]

Zazu, was it really necessary to call attention to the young lady's breasts? It sounds like she kept running into you in line, which is annoying, and that's the behavior that should be called out. There's no need to bring up her breasts. A random stranger bringing up her sexuality at Disneyland, especially in front of her father, can't have been good for her. I'm sure she was very embarrassed.

Why didn't you just say, "Excuse me, miss, you keep bumping into me. Please don't do that." You didn't need to point out that she is well endowed.

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

I think he was explaining a more complete view of the "stand your ground"law. :rimshot:

[Zazu]

Zazu, was it really necessary to call attention to the young lady's breasts?

I didn't, at the time. Only here, and then only for comic effect.

It sounds like she kept running into you in line, which is annoying, and that's the behavior that should be called out. ... A random stranger bringing up her sexuality at Disneyland, especially in front of her father, can't have been good for her. I'm sure she was very embarrassed.

Perhaps, but there is a qualitative difference between a kid bumping into me repeatedly and a young woman doing so. Well, perhaps not with me, but potentially with other men. And it did seem to give her father an excuse he may have been looking for to have a few words with her. Words she seemed to need.

It's a Big Bad World out there. I thought that I had a chance to send a preemptive message in a safe environment that might save her from harm in other environments later. It's what I was trained to identify as a "teachable moment", and those are few enough I try not to miss one.

My job as a teacher or off-duty CM? No. My responsibility as part of the larger community that's raising and helping protect that young woman? Perhaps. I hope her father thinks so.

[Amphigorey]

I didn't, at the time. Only here, and then only for comic effect.

...You didn't? Then what did you say? What you quoted in your first message was pretty clear, if that's what you actually said to her, especially the line about "rubbing her body against yours."

Perhaps, but there is a qualitative difference between a kid bumping into me repeatedly and a young woman doing so. Well, perhaps not with me, but potentially with other men. And it did seem to give her father an excuse he may have been looking for to have a few words with her. Words she seemed to need.

It's a Big Bad World out there. I thought that I had a chance to send a preemptive message in a safe environment that might save her from harm in other environments later. It's what I was trained to identify as a "teachable moment", and those are few enough I try not to miss one.

My job as a teacher or off-duty CM? No. My responsibility as part of the larger community that's raising and helping protect that young woman? Perhaps. I hope her father thinks so.

You embarrassed her unnecessarily. Believe me, she knows she has large breasts; she doesn't need a stranger to tell her so. You could have just told her to not run into you, instead of lecturing her on how dangerous it is to be a woman.

Also? She probably already knows that. She has probably already been the subject of harassment. Women start getting catcalled pretty early on, and she was at Disneyland, likely not thinking about it at all, and here you are to bring in a harsh reminder of that reality. She definitely needed to be reminded about proper behavior in line; I certainly would have done so, if she'd been ping-ponging against me. However, you chose to bring in the specter of sexual danger, which was unnecessary. Simply telling her to knock it off would have been plenty to let her know that other people notice and are affected by her.

[bookbabe]

I don't know. I've repeatedly had extremely under-dressed young ladies tell me that "it's just the style, miss" when to any adult within eyeshot it appears they have on nothing but a bra and a wide belt...oh, and those damn Uggs. And they honestly can't see what's wrong with wearing that to school...or to their co-op placement or part-time job. :EEP: I wouldn't necessarily bet that the girl in line had even the foggiest clue that what she was doing could be misconstrued, and I wouldn't guarantee that subtlety would get understood.

IMO, if more random people out in society clearly told teens that their clothing or actions were inappropriate, suggestive, whatever, maybe teachers and parents wouldn't have such a hard time convincing them of it...